benaikey

I usually stay out of politics, and for good reason. They’re none of my business. But should I be held to a double standard? No. So here’s what I propose: Barack Obama, stay out of sports.

You heard me right. You’re a politician. You don’t have any business in the sports world. I know most of you are out there wondering where this is going, and I’m about to make things clear.

Last night, Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game for the Chicago White Sox, an amazing feat only performed 17 previous times in the 100+ year history of Major League Baseball. Buehrle should be commended for his superb control on the mound, his endurance, and his ability to lead his teammates. But by no means should the president be calling him minutes after the game to congratulate him.

By no means am I saying he shouldn’t be able to give kudos when it’s due. In fact, it’s customary for a championship team to visit the White House to meet the president. But this isn’t the first time Obama has stuck his nose where it doesn’t belong.

During the pre-game show of the Super Bowl, after he had already been inaugurated and hence should have been fulfilling his duties to this great nation of ours, he felt the need to do a pointless pre-game interview, rambling on about football, and if I remember correctly, Jessica Simpson.

Around the same time, he did a few interviews regarding the BCS after controversy reared its ugly head yet again, sending Oklahoma to the Big 12 Championship (and later BCS National Championship) instead of Texas or Texas Tech in spite of identical records.

Fast forward to just after Selection Sunday, the beginning of the greatest event in all of college sports – the NCAA tournament. President Obama feels the need to go on Sportscenter and publicly fill out his bracket with ESPN analyst Andy Katz. I don’t care who you think will win it all, and you had no right to drag the Tarheels through the mud (no pun intended) by saying you picked them last year and they let you down. There are over 350 teams in Division I. The odds of any team winning are staggering, and to criticize college kids for not winning is despicable.

Earlier this month, he threw out the first pitch at the All-Star Game in St Louis. Again, what are you doing? I could possibly justify it if the game was in your adoptive hometown of Chicago, or Washington DC, where you should have been working on fixing this mess of an economy.

Which brings me to last night. Obama called Mark Buehrle just minutes after pitching a perfect game, then calling a press conference to talk about it.

Are you out of your mind? The unemployment rate hasn’t been this low since the Great Depression and you’ve got time to watch a baseball game and then hold a press conference and gloat about how someone from your favorite team threw a perfect game?

This really is the last straw for me. I didn’t support the man to begin with, but this absolutely tears it. When you campaigned, you promised to turn this economy around and pull our troops out of Iraq. Someone remind me, are we still there? Are people still losing their jobs at alarming rates? Yes, as a matter of fact, they are.

Step 1. Remove your head from your lower body cavity. Step 2. Get to work doing what you promised the American people you were going to do.

I don’t care if you’re a sports fan. So was Gerald Ford (R.I.P.), our 38^th president. He played college football at the University of Michigan as an offensive lineman. Did he ever waste time rambling on about sports and trying to be a celebrity instead of a president? No, he did not. Granted his term was short and not much was accomplished, but at least he didn’t give false hope to the people depending on him.

You should be completely and utterly ashamed of yourself. You promised change, and this is what we get? The Hershey’s slogan is right after all – change is bad. As much as people disliked Bush, he at least tried to get things done. You’ve acted like a spoiled movie star, talking to cameras and doing promotional crap instead of actually working. You’re no better than Lindsay Lohan or Flava Flav in my book.

My point is this. You were elected to do a job, and you haven’t done it. If you’d rather be a celebrity than a leader, do it. Resign and go make buddy cop movies with Sean Penn or some other bleeding-heart liberal. I didn’t vote for you, and if I could go back in time, I’d vote against you. According to recent reports by Yahoo! Sports, I’m not the only person in America to feel this way. Shape up. If California can do a recall election to remove a corrupt governor that was leading their state down the toilet, we should be able to do the same for the United States as a whole.

I’m by no means politically biased. I consider myself an independent, and vote for whichever candidate I believe is going to screw things up less. I don’t think McCain would have done a particularly great job either; I think this was an election where America lost no matter who won. But this is simply unacceptable. Your stimulus package has cost more jobs than it’s saved, and all those greedy companies leeching off your plan are still failing in spite of how much money your plan threw at them. Your stimulus plan is the New York Mets.

I’ll make a deal with you. Leave sports alone for awhile and do your job. I know it’s hard, but do you really want to be known as someone less competent than good old Dubya? At least make an effort to fix our economic problems. You owe it to all the poor suckers than believed in you and put you in office.

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