Pro Wrestling Ponderings

Welcome ladies and germs to another edition of the TNA Impact Report. I’m Zack Danielson as usual, and tonights edition of Impact is special since it takes place right after TNA’s great PPV last Sunday, Slammiversary. I thought it was a great show. Before i start, heres some quick results from the PPV:

TNA Slammiversary 2009:

Pre-show match: The British Invasion defeated Rhino and Jesse Neal after Eric Young, Rhino’s original partner, walked out of him

Match #1. King of The Mountain Match for the X-Division Championship: Suicide retained the title against Alex Shelley, Chris Sabin, Jay Lethal, and Consequences Creed

Match #2. Second Chance Match: Daniels defeated Shane Douglas

Match #3. TNA Knockouts Title Match: Angelina Love retained the title against Tara

Match #4. Monsters Ball Match: Abyss and Taylor Wilde defeated Daffney and RavenMatch

#5. Sting’s MEM spot on the line: Sting defeated Matt MorgenMatch #6. TNA World Tag Team Titles Match: Beer Money defeated Team 3DMatch #7. King of the Mountain Match for the TNA World Championship: Kurt Angle defeated Mick Foley, Jeff Jarrett, AJ Styles and Samoa Joe. Joe shocked the world by handing Angle the title and supposedly joining the Main Event Mafia

So there you have it, Samoa Joe joined the Main Event Mafia. I could bet all my money that no one saw that coming. So tonights episode of Impact should be interesting as There’s supposed to be an explanation of why Joe joined MEM. Without further of do, lets get to it:

TNA Impact 6/25/09:

-After the pyro in the Impact zone goes off, We start with the opening contest right away. This doesn’t happen too often in TNA, so I’m going to enjoy this.

Match #1. NYC Street Fight: Brother Ray vs. Brutus Magnus

- I wonder what a United Kingdom Street Fight would be like? Interesting enough, Magnus comes to the ring alone. Brother Ray attacks him from behind before he can enter the ring. They fight in the crowd, where Ray throws Magnus into the , and then Ray licks a poster on the wall with all three members of the Beautiful People on it. Can’t say I blame him. Ray brings a table into the ring, which brings Doug Williams, Rob Terry, Kiyoshi and Sheik Abdul Bashir out. Terry gives Ray a spinebuster. Before anything else can happen, Brother Devon runs out for the save and gives Terry a chair shot over the head, then followed with a 3-D on Kiyoshi through a table. It just ended when the heels ran away. Well that was strange. Who would of thought a street fight could end in a no contest. Thank you Russo.

Winner- No Contest (in 3:07) 1/2*

-Lauren talks to Kurt Angle backstage about how long the process had been to get Samoa Joe into the Main Event Mafia. Angle, who’s starting to look like a shorter, bald Brad Pitt in “Kalifornia,” just smiled and embraced Joe as he drove up.

-After Commercial, The Main Event Mafia comes out. I love the MEM  theme. Angle with hair still looks really, really weird. He introduces himself as the TNA Champion. He wishes to invite out the newest member of the MEM, from the Nation of Violence, Samoa Joe! And here Joe comes. I’m really liking the hip-hop remix of Joe’s music Hugs and handshakes for Angle, Booker T, Scott Steiner & Kevin Nash. It started with the Nation of Violence, when Joe came back from the beating the MEM gave him, and then the beatings started, and the MEM knew they had to sign him. Joe’s price was a little high, and that’s where Jenna came in. Jenna had enough money to bring in Joe, so apparently Survivor winners make a lot more money now than they did when I watched the show. Every MEM member took a bullet from Joe because that’s what family members do. If you didn’t get it, you’re a frickin’ moron. Apparently Angle forgot to tell Sting, but apologizes and says what Sting didn’t know won’t hurt him.

Here comes Mick Foley! Angle doesn’t owe him an explanation, he owes him a rematch at Victory Road. Angle saw Foley after the match and wants him to cry like he did then. He’s a disgrace to his family and TNA. Angle’s the one with the power, in his contract it says he has the right to pick his opponent at Victory Road. Foley got emotional, and he brings up how he got a three-count on Angle at Slammiversary. This little crybaby will kick Angle’s ass. But it’s Angle’s night of celebration, and he gives a proposal…they can go back to Foley’s office, have a couple of drinks and come to an agreement. He’ll see him backstage! Promo wise, a Foley and Angle feud can be great. As for the actual match, well that’s debatable.

- Lauren tries to talk to AJ Styles…Kip James points AJ in the direction of Joe and AJ is off! Tough night for our favorite blond haired interviewer…

-Jeff Jarrett did an interview “over the phone” saying he would resolve his differences with Foley next week once and for all. This was all for Jarrett on the night.

-There was a vignette for Sarah Stock, with footage of her in action from AAA and CMLL. She will debut in three weeks under the name “Sarita.” God I love the Knockouts division

Match #2. Kevin Nash vs. Abyss

-Abyss comes out first, followed by Nash, and we head to commercial before the match begins. After break, we see Nash working over Abyss in the corner, but Abyss fires back with punches, but Nash gets a clothesline. Back into the corner. This is a true big man match. Clothesline in the corner by Nash. He poses for the fans. Whip reversed, splash in the corner by Abyss, another one gets an elbow,then Abyss gets clotheslined over the top. They go outside, Nash gets a chair but misses, Abyss bangs his head into the guardrail and the steps. Back into the ring, Abyss gets the chair, and places it in a corner between the 2nd & 3rd ropes, but Nash gains the advantage, gets the chair…Dr. Stevie comes in and tazes Abyss! What the hell? Nash covers Abyss for the win. Jesus that tazer shot looked fake as hell. This was just a bad match

Winner: Kevin Nash (via pin at 4:00) 1/4*

-After commercial break, Beer Money are in the ring to cut a promo. BEER….MONEY! Robert Roode starts to challenge Team 3-D to a rematch, but Booker and Steiner comes out. Booker talks about all the great tag teams he and Steiner had been a part of. Booker said that Angle and Foley had just made an agreement for Victory Road where Nash will face Styles for the Legends title, Foley would face Angle for the TNA Heavyweight title, and Booker and Steiner will face Beer Money for the tag belts. Storm does a tremendous babyface comeback interview. Booker brings back his old “Tell me he didn’t say that” catchphrase. I love it. Booker then claims Foley had agreed to let Booker face Storm and Steiner face Roode tonight. Team 3-D comes out and said Foley had already granted them a rematch at Victory Road. Steiner said that Ray had a problem with his pituitary gland. What kind of message does that send? Ray starts doing Steiner impressions, which was amusing. Ray said 3-D would make Foley an offer he couldn’t refuse to get the rematch. This was a nice segment. I wouldn’t mind seeing a Beer Money/MEM feud.

Match #3. 10,000 Thumbtack Match: Taylor Wilde vs. Daffney

-Taylor would have to be the toughest bitch in the world to go in the tacks with what she’s wearing. Rules are the tacks were suspended in a bag on a pole above the ring. Wow, i wondering who would book a pole match? Daffeny attacks Taylor from behind, followed by a few slaps . West comments that Daffney reminds him of his first wife…I can only hope my first wife is like that. Taylor gets the upper advantage and gets the bag, but Daffney rakes the eyes and hits her with the bag. Daffney opens the bag and pours the tacks on the mat! They tease the tacks for awhile, and then Taylor drops Daffney on them! Well that was way too short to be any good.

Winner: Taylor Wilde (via thumbtack slamming at 2:45) 1/2*

- Backstage, the Beautiful People (minus Angelina Love)  cut a promo on Tara, which is apparently short for Tarantula. 15 seconds later, a freakin tarantula appears on Madison Rayne’s shoudlers. Um……..ok?

-In Foley’s office, Team 3D pleads for a tag team title shot. Foley & 3D don’t care about each other’s losses. Next week we get to see 3D vs. Booker & Steiner…maybe. Ray has a barbed wire baseball bat. Foley begs them to take the match. Devon says they’ll take the match, Ray wishes him a nice day. Foley doesn’t care. Ok, moving on……

Match #4. Scott Steiner vs. Robert Roode

-Steiner gets the advantage early, beating Roode down in the corner. Roode gets back the advantage with a rolling neck snap and does the “Beer Money” spot with the crowd after a vertical suplex. Then he gets tossed outside, and Steiner sends him into the rail and the steps. Overhead belly to belly by Steiner gets two. Clothesline and a flexing bicep by Steiner, then the push ups! Gotta love that. Crowd trying to get behind Roode…I never thought I’d see that after what he did to my Miss Brooks. Steiner with the bearhug, Roode fights back, but gets kicked, but Roode  bounces back with a clothesline. Roode to the middle rope, blockbuster gets two! Steiner with a flatliner gets a two count! He goes for the Recliner, Roode fights out, after a series of reversals, Steiner gets a backslide for three! Well this was the best match of the night so far, but that’s not saying too much.

Winner: Scott Steiner (via pin at 5:26) **

- Jeremy Borash is with Kurt Angle. Borash is trying to stir the shit as usual…Angle says he’ll take care of Foley next week. Angle says he’s the godfather, and Sting isn’t. Apparently Sting’s on his way right now and he wants answers. Why in the world is he texting Borash? Well, whatever. If they were really on the technological ball, Borash should have said that Sting tweeted him that message…and it makes more sense that Borash would be following Sting on Twitter than Sting allegedly texting Borash messages. I’ve put way too much thought into this.

-JB is with Foley again after break. Foley was asked about Jarrett’s phone call from earlier tonight. He said if Jarrett was willing to apologize, he’d be willing to listen. Borash then told Foley about Angle being unhappy about his tag team plan. Foley went on another rant about being stressed out about losing the TNA title. This was the last of Foley on Impact tonight

-After a video package for Eric Young, Lauren is backstage with EY for an interiview. Young says he was sick of being the court jester of the company. Rhino then walks in with a Detroit Lions jersey on. Nothing screams jobber more than that. Rhino is pissed about EY bailing on him as his partner at Slammiersary. Young goes on to challenge Rhino to a match next week and then head butted him. Then Jesse Neal runs in to check on Rhino and vowed to join Rhino in order to get Young “on our time.” Then Rhino gets mad at Neal and tossed him aside. It’s like they’ve started the process of turning Rhino heel but forgot to give him something relevant to turn heel against.

- Lauren talks to Booker T about his match with James Storm. Booker claims the Dudleys (who?) beat nobody. Sharmell wants Jenna’s bony butt in the ring and she claims they have a match at Victory Road. Dear God, why? OK, I know they’re feuding, but who wants to see that match? Even worse, i have to see that shit live.

Match #5. Booker T (with Sharmell) vs. James Storm

-Glad to see Storm back in the ring in a singles match. Booker tries to throw Storm over the top, but Storm skinned the cat, only to have Booker give him a botched hot shot. Booker throws some knees and got the spin kick for a two count. Booker missed an ax kick, and Storm got a neckbreaker. Sharmell then gives Booker Storm’s beer bottle, which Booker whacked Storm with for the DQ. Referee Earl Hebner was selling his eyes while Storm was laid out. Nothing much going on here.

Winner: James Storm (via DQ at 3:15) *

- AJ Styles is in the ring and he wants a damn explanation from Samoa Joe. HE DON’T KNOW HIM NO MORE! FACE HIM LIKE A MAN! Joe comes out and faces him. AJ asks Joe if he did it for the money. Don’t we all do it for the money? What kind of a dream world does AJ live in? He continues to state the obvious, as Joe screwed the company and screwed the fans. He also screwed himself. Wow, I thought Joe was married and didn’t need to do that…well, then again… Who got to Joe, AJ wants to know. Joe is done, but AJ isn’t and attacks Joe for no reason as far as I can tell. Matt Morgan attacks Styles! Joe & Morgan give Styles a good ol’ fashioned beatdown, here comes Daniels! Unfortunately Daniels is a foot shorter than everybody in the ring, and here come Booker, Steiner & Nash! Why in the world is the bell ringing? Here comes Sting in a purple coat and gray t-shirt! What a fashion disaster! Wait a damn minute, we get a commercial break and then we get to hear him talk? Mike Tenay, you better be a goddamn liar or I’m gonna fuck you up.

After break, Sting starts to talk about expecting this nonsense from Angle, but not from everybody else. He says it was because of punks like Joe that they started the Mafia to begin with. What else didn’t Sting know? Morgan tells Sting that Angle had everything to do with Morgen going after him. Where does Nash stand? Sting is more surprised with Nash than the rest of them. Wolfpac, man! Nash tells Sting that he stuck up for him and believed in what he had to say. He kept the rest of them from cutting Sting off at the knees. But he went along with Kurt on Morgan because Sting’s plan isn’t working and Kurt’s is. The honor and dignity thing is bullshit. It’s about money! They bought Joe because they couldn’t beat him. Nice way of putting Joe over. Nash says you can make friends or money, but you can’t make both. Sting brings up Nash’s son and speaks to the real Kevin. Wow, it’s like watching a Ring of Glory show all of a sudden. Sting offers Kevin his bat and says he can take him out for the Mafia. He turns his bat to him…but he had one of his own and takes out the rest of the Mafia…except for Joe. Joe gets a shot, and the Mafia beats Sting down! It should be noted that Nash wasn’t actually part of that part of the beatdown, but in any event Sting is down as we fade to black.

Final Thoughts: The last promos were damn fine. Really, all the promos this week were good, but not so much the matches. But this week’s Impact wasn’t supposed to be about great matches, it was about building more feuds and building to the July PPV. I think they did a good job at that. Joe and Morgan in the top heel group is a better pairing that Sting being a reluctant heel. It’ll be interesting to see where Angle fits in the grand scheme of things, because he’s the top heel again with time running out on his contract. We’ll see what this all leads to next week. I’m Zack Danielson, and I’ll be back for next weeks edition of Impact.

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-The opening video still gets me pumped up to watch wrestling. Not the Papa Roach one, the very initial one. It’s just well done.

-Raw starts out with Vince looking very casual and… bright. Powder blue, Vince, I’m impressed. He can’t give a commercial free Raw, but he CAN give the fans their money back. He’s simply just not going to. Keep that pimp hand strong, Vince. He’s going to shake things up, though, and the special guest host of Raw this week… “The Animal” Dave Batista! He’s out complete with suit and arm… cast? Brace? Apparatus. It’s color coordinated for our viewing pleasure. He starts things off pretty quick. We’ve got The Miz vs. John Cena and MVP vs. HHH in a mini-tournament for who gets a shot at Randy Orton at Night Of Champions.

-Randy Orton interrupts. It’s really badly advised, as Batista is in charge and he can fire ALL of Legacy tonight if he wanted! Apparently, Trump made a trade to bring 5 people to Raw. Tonight, Orton faces 3 of them in a gauntlet-style match!

COMMERCIAL!

-MVP vs. HHH

I’m actually very much looking forward to this. This could be a solid face vs. face match. I wonder if anyone ever gets pissed off when HHH throws his water into the crowd and they get drenched. Anyways, they start slow and HHH has the power advantage, but he is selling his knee from the previous week’s battles with Orton. HHH is giving some warning shots to MVP to stay off of the knee, but MVP is not so easily swayed. It’s slow and not so glamorous, but this is a good story. MVP isn’t doing anything heel-ish, he’s just capitalizing on something in his favor. He puts HHH in the Figure Four, making me smile when he tries to point out HHH’s shoulders on the canvas. HHH gets his face slammed into the knee, followed by the BALLIN’! Elbow Drop. MVP hit’s the Yakuza Kick in the corner for a really nice near fall. Playmaker gets reversed to the Pedigree and HHH picks up the 1-2-3!

COMMERCIAL!

-Putting the Unified Tag Belts on Jericho and Edge was really, really smart. You can now put two of your best heels on every show. That could never be a bad move.

-Unified Tag Team Championship Match: Chris Jericho and Edge © vs. The Colons (Primo and Carlito)Jericho starts it out with, what else, a promo. It’s like he spends all day looking up the biggest words possible. I’m begging this match to get time, as it good do a lot for Carlito and Primo as faces. There’s no reason they should win this match, but that doesn’t mean you can’t give the illusion that they could. Primo and Jericho start us out. It doesn’t take long for Edge to try and cheat for his team, but that backfires as Primo knocks him off the apron, and then Back Body Drops Jericho down onto him on the outside! And that gets followed up with a Double Baseball Slide Dropkick by Primo and Carlito! I like it, solid start to the match.

COMMERCIAL!

-We’re back, and Jericho is now with an advantage over Primo due to do double flapjack during the break. Primo tries a comeback but eats an Enziguri from Chris Jericho. Primo makes the comeback and Carlito and Jericho do some pretty good back and forth. Jericho misses his Lionsault, but Carlito hit’s an Asai Moonsault for a great near fall! Jericho goes for a Slingshot, but Carlito punches Edge off the apron and then hit’s a Springboard Crossbody onto Jericho for another hot near fall! Jericho makes the tag and Edge goes for a Spear, but Primo saves that. Edge is pissed, and knocks Primo down, which just leaves him open to the Back Stabber from Carlito! ONE! TWO! THR- JERICHO breaks it up! That right there was great, because Edge made no motion at all to kick out. Normally you get the guy kicking out, making the break-up of the cover absolutely worthless. Primo dives out onto Jericho, taking him out of the match. In the ring, Carlito goes for his Springboard Back Elbow, but Jericho shoves Primo into the ropes, screwing that up. Carlito is pissed, and turns around RIGHT into a Spear! ONE! TWO! THREE!

COMMERCIAL!

-We’re back, and Batista lets Orton know that if Legacy interferes at all in the gauntlet, they’ll be fired on the spot.

-Great highlight package for the Cena/Miz feud. Say what you will about Miz being “buried” in all this, but he is getting major exposure. In WWE, perception is reality, and they are trying to push the fact that Miz has a chance against John Cena. Not everybody can hang with him. The Miz is. Think about that.

COMMERCIAL!

-John Cena vs. The MizMiz, to his credit, weathers the early storm and takes over on John Cena. BAAAAAAAAACCCKCKKKKKACKCKCK BODY DROP to Miz! Does anybody else miss Vince as an announcer? I don’t want to be the only one. Cena hits his Fisherman’s Suplex and slaps on a Chinlock. Odd. Miz gets the break from the ref, and does not give a clean break, hitting a Suplex and slapping on a Chinlock of his own. Cena pretty easily powers out of that, so Miz lifts a knee to the mid-section and keeps control. Neckbreaker gets 2 for Miz. Cena starts his comeback, but Miz stops it by shoving Cena off from a Bulldog! He then hit’s a Spinning Neckbreaker and damnit, this is exactly how you put over a heel trying to get credibility.

COMMERCIAL!

-We’re back and Miz got a Double Axe Handle to the back of the neck during the break. Again Miz cuts off a Cena comeback by avoiding a charge and then hitting a high powered Clothesline for a 2 count. One thing Miz has, compared to most other young guys, is the fact he gives facial expressions to his surroundings in the match. He REACTS to what is happening to him, and what he is doing. Cena finally looks to get a comeback but Miz cuts it off AGAIN, hitting an Electric Chair Drop for a couple close 2 counts! I can’t explain how well this match has been worked up until now. No one expected Miz to come in aggressive. No one expected Miz to come in and dominate. To ward off so many John Cena comebacks. It makes both guys looks better, as Miz is getting a believable beat down and Cena is going to look even better from coming back from such a beat down. After being put down with a sleeper, Cena makes the comeback we all saw coming, and finishes the match off with the STF.

COMMERCIAL!

-We’re back and Legacy are worried. Well, DiBiase isn’t. His dad, Ted DiBiase, is going to host Raw next week! I’m excited.

-Fatal 4-way Divas MatchI’m not interested, I don’t care. I have nothing to say about this match. I’m missing my millionth re-watch of the 2008 World Series Of Poker!

COMMERCIAL!

-Non-Title Match: The Big Show vs. Kofi Kingston ©This starts out, as you would imagine, with Big Show dominating Kofi in every which way. Nothing Kofi does is really taking The Big Show down. It takes a Springboard Dropkick to take him down, which is pretty impressive in and of itself. He hit’s the BOOM Leg Drop for 2, but Show kicks out and almost presses him to the ceiling. Kofi hits his leap-up 10 punches in the corner, but Big Show has enough of that about 2 punches in and just throws Kofi to the outside. And the ref…counts to 10?

COMMERCIAL!

Match 1: Randy Orton vs. EVAN BOURNE!

Alright, I’m excited already. Bourne could get squashed here, and I’m just happy that he’s on Raw, finally. He gets a fair sized amount of offense, though, making me even happier. It’s good to see Bourne use his high impact offense on a guy like Orton, because it shows he can do it safely. TOWER OF LONDON! HA! That was actually pretty great. For those that don’t want ROH, Bourne went for his Shooting Star Press, but Orton pushed the legs out. With Bourne draped over the ropes, Orton pulled him off and drilled him with an RKO. That gets the 3 count on Evan Bourne.

Another huge coup. That‘s two big young stars. This is going to change Raw a lot. Not tonight, however, as Swagger simply goes to the apron and gets counted out. His reasoning? He wanted to make an impression on Randy Orton. Orton certainly appreciates that.

Orton is, understandably, scared as shit. But Henry grabs a mic and says he wants to make an impression too! He… also goes to the apron to get counted out. Or not! Well, this is a great way to get Henry some face heat. Orton slumps to his knees and is begging Henry not to do anything. This means shit to the Strongest Man In The World, who proceeds to run a train on Orton. Orton tries for the RKO, but Henry blocks it. WORLDS STRONGEST SLAM! ONE! TWO! THREE!

-Post match, Batista is out and he looks very happy with himself.

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I know what you’re thinking. Jerome bragged and bragged about not spending 40 bucks for this Pay-Per-View. Yet here I am reviewing the show just 24 hours later. I’ll let you use your imaginations on how yours truly is reviewing the show. And to show you what a swell guy I am, you’re even getting STAR RATINGS. With all that in mind…

We begin with one of those overdone overdramatic video packages that still doesn’t make me care about Randy Orton and Triple H in the slightest.

-Live from Philadelphia, California (I’ll explain this as the show goes on.)

-Your hosts are the six dwarves. The seventh got future endeavored before the show.

- ECW Title Scramble Match: Tommy Dreamer © vs. Christian vs. Finlay vs. Jack Swagger vs. Mark Henry

I’d say I’m glad to get the crap out of the way, but I get the sense that this might be at the top of the heap quality wise. I like how they explain the rules but won’t use the word time limit. Swagger and Christian start. Good idea since they’re probably the best workers on the brand right now. These two have their usual match and a SWANK takedown is done by Swagger. “Let’s go Christian” chants as the net entrant comes in. Fit Finlay runs in and he nails Christian . He just goes nuts on Swagger and Christian. I only wish it could be these three for the remainder of the match. Christian comes back but Swagger drags him outside. Swagger gets a three count on a roll-up and is now the “current ECW champion.” Finlay is getting his eye examined as Christian gets The Kill Switch reversed. Crowd is very into this, very good since the ECW guys never get this much heat. Tommy Dreamer now runs in and goes mad as Finlay did moments ago. Man, even Dreamer is getting heat. Something in the air tonight. Something gets really botched with Christian in the tree of woe and Swagger tries to throw Dreamer. Things just stop for a second. The four competitors wonder around the outside before Finlay hits the Celtic Cross for three. Now he is the current champion. No word yet on the “allotted time” at any point. These guys seem to be walking around like lost puppies. Must have run out of stuff to do before Mark Henry walks in. He sucks as a wrestle, but his theme music is awesome. Big suplex spot as we’ve got five minutes left in something WWE won’t call a time limit. Henry hits The World’s Strongest Slam for three. Now they focus on Henry for a tic and send him outside. Swagger is deposited as well. Christian is sent out while Finlay and Dreamer each separately dive onto Swagger. Christian feels left out and dives. Mark Henry also wants to join the party but Swagger chop blocks him, reverse splashes him, and pins him. Christian engages the Kill Switch but Dreamer breaks up the pin. He gets the DDT and three. The crowd DIES. Wow. Dreamer bcame the champion, and this crowd went absolutely apathetic. They’re not even popping for the numerous two counts done in the final minute. Why is Dreamer covering people?

What a poorly booked match. The ending was completely anti-climatic and the wrong guy one. Crowd seemed to want of these other four guys to win but Dreamer slithers away with the belt. Four more weeks of him as champion? No buys.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 14:57/Tommy Dreamer (still ECW champion)/*1/2

-Referee takes forever to give Dreamer the belt for whatever reason. This would start the theme of wasting a ton of time.

-We get a GODDAMN TELEVISION COMMERCIAL ON A WWE PAY-PER-VIEW. WHAT?

-Edge complains to Teddy Long about not being on the Pay-Per-View, more specificallywanting the world title match made into a world title three way. Edge says Long will end up like Vickie, without a job. Nice suit on Long.

- IC Title vs. Mask Match: Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio

Swear to God, if this doesn’t get 15 minutes, this show is an automatic thumbs down. No arguments. They show some of the greatness that’s led into this match. No video package for this of course despite the fact that this has been the best angle in WWE during 2009. Jim Ross spouts off some mask history. See, we need Mike Tenay circa 1998 for this match. Charles Robinson is the referee, so this is a WCW reunion. Bell rings and there are some LOUD “Y2J” chants. Really? In California? Someone needs to tell these fans that Jericho is a heel and should be booed. Jericho holds the early advantage before a rana takes him outside. Mysterio attacks but is viciously thrown into the rail. Wow. Continued “Y2J” chants. Jericho takes Rey Rey to school now with a suplex and then a reverse chinlock. Mysterio briefly shows signs of life but a backbreaker snuffs that out. Dropkick to the outside and Jericho just looks at the crowd with the smuggest look ever. Mysterio with a kick and a series of forearms. Jericho with a one-footed dropkick into the chinlock again. Mysterio back kicks and Jericho is sent flying. Big dive onto the outside. Cross body gets two back in the ring. Mysterio springboard moonsaults off two of the ropes. 1-2-NO! Powerslam. 1-2-NOO! Jericho slows the pace down as the Mysterio fans make their presence known. Moonsault by Mysterio gets two. Attempted facebuster turned into the Walls of Jericho. Mysterio… just… gets…to the ropes. 619 misses and Jericho hits a vicious clothesline. Both guys at the top. Hurancanrana turned into a powerbomb from the top. Even with his feet on the ropes, Jericho gets two. Lionsault misses. Hurancanrana is hit this time and gets two. Dropkick to the back . Jericho reverses the 619, but Mysterio reverses the reversal. OH MY GOD! Jericho gets the codebreaker off another reversal. 1-2-NOOOOOOO! Jericho is indignant. Mysterio is rammed into the top turnbuckle. Both guys are at the top again. Doesn’t work out well. Mysterio finally hits the 619 but the West Coast Pop is REVERSED. WALLS OF JERICHO! Series of pinfalls now. Jericho rips Mysterio’s mask, but he’s wearing ANOTHER ONE! 1-2-3!

Jim Ross called this a main event, and I was not inclined to disagree. Regardless of how good or bad this show, you need to see this match. This is the second best match WWE has produced this year. I’m not even gonna nitpick about time or the angle being short-shrifted. This was an awesome match, and nothing could possibly follow it.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 15:44/Rey Mysterio (New Intercontinental Champion)/****1/2

-Advertisement for Summerslam… Aren’t they forgetting about a Pay-Per-View or is that one going to be a secret too?

- A look at this past Monday. Amazing how they’ve shown it on ECW, Superstars, and Smackdown yet I still don’t care and have fast-forwarded through it each and every time.

-Jericho now complains to Teddy Long about Mysterio having two masks. Long says in one month, it’ll be five years for him as GM. Suddenly, I get a very sick feeling.

-Dolph Ziggler video package. Wait… he gets one but mask versus title doesn’t? That’s also no buys

- NO DQ Match: Dolph Ziggler vs. The Great Khali

I don’t mind this on free television but paying for this is a whole nother story. All I ask is that they keep it short.

Ziggler bumps like a champ, but Khali’s attempts at selling are comical. Pretty vicious champs too. Ziggler does some leg work and introduces a chair. Uh oh. FAMEASSER! FAMEASSER! Leave the memories alone there Dolph. Billy Gunn reminders are not appreciated, especially considering how much you look like him. Oh God. Kane is back. Ziggler blitzes with a chair. Now Kane takes the chair and beats up Khali. Crowd cheers this even though Kane is clearly a heel and Khali is a face. It’s academic as Ziggler gets a BS victory. Way to push the young talent WWE. Just wait. It gets worse.

While I’m happy Dolph is moving on to something bigger (hopefully) and better, we now get a Khali/Kane feud. It sucked at Wrestlemania 23 and it will likely suck more now.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 5:01/Dolph Ziggler/ ½*

-Vince and Teddy talk some more. Vince says Teddy has accomplished nothing and says that numerous other unemployed GMs have done better. Vince says he would shoot himself from boredom if he was in a foxhole with Teddy and mocks his dance. Yeah Vince, go fuck yourself. Teddy must be leaving WWE, and they’re giving him one of their grand send-offs.

-12 Rounds DVD Commercial

-Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole talk while the Carlitos come to ringside. They make a note about them being able to defend against teams from any other brand. Michael Cole also says he can identify with Teddy Long after a question by Lawler. Hilarious.

- Unified Tag Team Title Match: Carlito and Primo Colon © vs. Legacy

Should be noted that Dibiase is wearing different colored tights then Rhodes. Teddy Long appears and adds a new team. Edge comes out, and the first name that pops to my mind… CHRISTIAN. Awwww. It’s Jericho. First time I’ve ever said that. So now we have:

- Unified Tag Team Title Match: Carlito and Primo Colon © vs. Legacy vs. Rated Y2J

The other teams are not happy. Basically, the Legacy/Colons issue is out the window at this point. They do get to start, but Jericho tags in. He doesn’t last long as it’s once again Legacy and Primo. “We want Christian” chants. Who died and made the California fans snarky? Does Matt Winton know this? Clearly this was a last minute decision because most of the spots are being done by the two RAW teams. Strictly back and forth as they’re on the other side of Rated Y2J. Edge finally tags in to a huge babyface pop. He misses a spear and Dibiase tags in. Crowd is asleep except when the main eventers enter. “Edge” chants now with some “Edge and Christian” chants mixed in as well. I just watched the American Wolves against Bryan Danielson and Tyler Black from the Markham show. This isn’t even half as good as that match. Doesn’t help the two best workers in the match have spent the majority of the match on the outside. Carlito picks the pace up when he gets tagged in. Uh oh. Jericho runs in and gets the codebreaker. Carlito punches Edge. As Carlito takes Dibiase out of the corner, Edge tags him Carlito hits the Backcracker. Edge then tags Carlito with a spear. Three count and we have NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!!!!

If these guys don’t wrestle on every brand for the next six months, WWE fails. I don’t even care so much that they essentially buried the RAW duos because I’d rather see Jericho and Edge on RAW, ECW, and Smackdown anyway.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 9:39/Edge and Chris Jericho (NEW Unified Tag Team Champions)/**

-Randy Orton doesn’t care about Dibiase and Rhodes not winning the tag belts. Dibiase yells at Randy. It’s far too early for tension between these guys. These Legacy guys are dorks. Build them up. Then have Dibiase go bonkers and become the babyface you think he can be for the company.

- WWE Women’s Title Match: Melina © vs. Michelle McCool

Maryse has a great personality. Beth Phoenix and Mickie James are fine women’s professional wrestlers. Yet McCool and Melina get on the Pay-Per-View. Must be nice banging wrestler in high places. I leave it to the reader to figure out the context of that statement. This might be a Pay-Per-View, but I’m still not doing play-by-play. All that needs to be said is these girls stiffed the bajesus out of each other and there was lots of screaming. I’ll also point out that these girls got to wrestle in complete silence. How is becoming the women’s champion of each brand prestigious? They’re both WWE belts, and it’s case of circumstances allowing someone to be able to hold both belts, not skill. This match is going on forever. At least it’s not as bad as you would think and I feared. McCool wins with the match and the championship with the STYLES CLASH. Hey, when you can’t even execute the damn thing properly, you don’t get to call it the dumbass name WWE gave it.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 6:35/Michelle McCool (new women’s champion)/Michelle McCool/*

-Jim Ross says it’s time for the main event. Nice dig at RAW there.

- World Title Match: CM Punk © vs. Jeff Hardy

Punk gets boss, and Hardy gets the cheers. Punk kisses the belt ala Bret Hart. Crowd is chanting Hardy heavily while Punk just smiles smugly. Feeling out process. Thank God Hardy dumped the goofy facepaint. arHard Hardy works a headlock and gets the crowd to chant for him. Punk hooks in his own headlock. Shoulder tackle. Punk sets up for the Go 2 Sleep but is reversed. Hardy tries the Twist of Face but no dice. Punk ends up outside the ring. Hardy dives on Punk and rams him into the rail. He misses whatever, and Punk goes back inside the ring. Punk interferes with the count because he’s such a swell guy… or he wants the ref to count faster. Two count as Punk yells at referee Scott Armstrong. Yeah, I said his name. Wanna fight about it? Punk figure fours the head now, and Punk follows up with a backbreaker. Back to the figure four but Hardy reaches the rope. Punk misses a second rope leg drop and then a Stinger splash. Hardy gets the Whisper in the Wind for two. Clothesline. Another one. Hardy then gets atomic drop. Legdrop followed by a dropkick to the head. Then a front forward suplex. Punk gets out of the way but Hardy hits another clothesline. Dropkick into the corner but this almost turns out badly. Punk stiffs hardy with a kick and knee. Ouch. Bulldog gets another two count. Kicks to the knees but the roaring elbows (MISAWA!)don’t work. Hardy takes his shirt off but misses the Swanton. Punk makes the sign for Go 2 Sleep but Hardy gets an inside cradle for another two. Another stiff kick but another Go 2 Sleep attempt is turned into a Swanton. He connects this time and gets three. GOD- Wait. Punk’s foot was underneath the rope. Armstrong says the match must continue. Hardy is obviously not happy

We re-start. Now it’s on, but Punk gets an elbow to the eye. He sells it very well. And he kicks Armstrong in the back. That was actually a very creative finish. If you paid 40 dollars for the show, I imagine you’re not happy, but this was a great way to further Punk’s heel turn (if that’s where they’re going with this). Punk continues to oversell the eye.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 15:04/Jeff Hardy by DQ/***

-Hardy shows poor sportsmanship by attacking Punk after the match. What a jerk. Referees break it up as Punk continues to sell the eye. This is so awesome.

-The Colons complain to Teddy Long about getting hosed. The Colons speak Spanish. Guess we know what’s going to happen tomorrow night. Rated Y2J vs. Colons. Count me in.

- I know I called Tyler Black the Lex Luger of our generation, but Hardy is absolutely challenging him for that title. It’s going to be a race, but one of these two men will receive this honor in the year end awards.

-Randy Orton is… CALLING SCODY RHODES ON HIS CELLPHONE. What a heel.

We’re running woefully short on time, but we get an extended video package showcasing the John Cena/Miz feud. Dumb.

- John Cena vs. The Miz

This feud could have been so great and really elevated Miz to unprecedented levels. I’ve got very little hope that WWE does the right thing here and puts Miz over.

The announcers make it clear Miz isn’t in Cena’s league. Then five minutes later, it’s made clear Miz isn’t in Cena’s league because he’s jobbed out. Even worse, he taps with both hands like a jobber when he’s put into the STF. What is this? Fucking ROH on HDnet? Superstars? Way to bury someone who could have been a star. Fucking awesome WWE. You give Cena a victory against someone he could have had an extended program with because… you’re afraid? WCW did this same bullshit on Pay-Per-View after Pay Per-View, and they’re dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. But I guess seeing another Cena/Big Show match is more important than elevating people.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 5:40/John Cena/*

-One more thing. John Morrison should hug Chris Jericho, Edge, and CM Punk because as awkward as his face turn has been, he’s at least being elevated. He’s having very good matches and even got to pin the world champion clean as a whistle. Miz? Just another geek mid-carder.

-Another extended video package despite the fact that there’s about a half hour left for this show. Someone should tell Kevin Dunn people pay to see the matches, not the pretty little video packages that are put together.

-WWE Title Three Stages of Hell Match: Randy Orton © vs. HHH

- (The 1st Fall is a Regular Match, The 2nd Fall is Falls Count Anywhere Match, If Needed, the 3rd Fall is a Stretcher Match.)

That last match completely turned me off to this show. I’d complain about the time again, but I have no interest in watching Triple H and Orton. They actually get to call this a wrestling match. Wonder if Vince is backstage pouting because that evil word has to be used. Orton and Triple H have a rather weak start with some not so intense brawling. Orton starts working the leg. I roll my eyes. B-O-R-I-N-G. Orton works the leg a lot. Triple H gets sent to the outside. He then grabs a chair and nails Orton. Orton wins the first fall at 4:52 by disqualification. Hunter uses the chair to further destroy Orton. Since it’s Falls Count Anywhere, it doesn’t matter. Orton is so beat up that he goes outside. Triple H follows him, hits the pedigree on the outside, and wins the second fall in 1:24. That thump Orton’s head made was just plain nasty. The stretcher is brought out and the line is established. Orton gets up and kicks the stretcher at Hunter’s leg. Back to the leg work now. Lovely. They take their fight into the crowd. Of course the PG rating means no blood and things not getting too intense. Orton gets so frustrated at one point he rips the padding off the rails. He hits Hunter with them, and it makes a far better sound then you’d think. He then rams Triple H into the steel a few times for good measure. Orton continues to dominate the fall. Orton begins moving furniture and send s the steps into the ring. As he’s about to hit Hunter, he feels the wrath of a drop toehold. That was pleasant. Orton gets nailed with the stairs. Now it’s time to go for a ride. Orton prevents the loss barely. Hunter and Orton end up on the stretcher, and they roll. Wow, what an incredibly dangerous maneuver. Orton DDTs Hunter off the stretcher onto the steel ramp. Back body drop sets Triple H up right on the stretcher. He rolls, but Hunter manages to get himself off. Orton readies the RKO but Hunter sends him into the sign. Pedigree but both men are down. As Triple H is finally about to end this feud, Cody Rhodes interferes. Again, Triple H is about to win, but Dibiase makes his triumphant return. Rhodes joins him. Triple H manages to fight all three guys. Cody must be having flashbacks to his father and his ability to fight off the odds. Hunter introduces Mr. Slegdey, but Orton hits a low blow and nails him with a piece of the stage. He finally pulls Hunter over the yellow line at 15:06.

This was barely better then the Wrestlemania main event, but there was a little drama thanks to the interference by the Legacy dorks. Still, I have a hunch these two are getting another match at “Night of Champions.” Hell in a Cell maybe? Anyway you slice it, I’m not looking forward to ever seeing these guys against each other ever again.

Time/Winner/STAR RATING: 21:22/Randy Orton (still WWE champion)/**1/2

After the match, Triple H hits Orton in the back with the sledgehammer because God forbid this feud ever ends, and God forbid Orton gets any heat whatsoever.

Final Thoughts: I have to give this show a thumbs down because there was far too much stupidity for me to justify saying “Spend 40 bucks on this.” I do have high standards for these shows primarily because of the expense. The Cena squash was very anger inducing and soured me on the show a great deal. Orton and Hunter was at least better then Mania but not even as good as the match they had Monday. Guess which one people had to pay for though? There were also a couple matches (Melina/McCool and Ziggler/Khali) that had no business on this show when guys like Edge, John Morrison, the Hart Dynasty, and John Morrison weren’t booked.

However, there was still some goodness to be found amidst the maddening sucktitude. Jericho and Rey had a definite match of the year candidate with all kinds of reverals, nearfalls, and a really good finish that has been built up from past matches. I’m also coming under the assumption that Edge is hurt based on him being used in a tag match and only really doing the spear. Edge and Jericho as a team is very interesting, and they NEED to be used on every brand. They can feud with anyone or team and make them better. Finally, Punk is the most interesting he’s ever been as he leans closer to being a heel. I liked the ending but can see why people would get mad about it.

Hopefully, we can make this a monthly deal where the site can produce a report every month. Until then, we’ll see you for RAW tonight.

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-We should be having a new Smackdown reviewer for next week, so this will likely be my last one. Last week, Jeff Hardy and CM Punk each defeated the men involved in the “Mask vs. Title” Intercontinental championship match. This week, we get a cage match and Punk in a non-title match with John Morrison. Sounds like more goodness. With that being said…

-Taped from just another Chicago suburb

-Your hosts those guys… you know the ones

Vince McMahon opens things up. Well, there goes this show. I’m reviewing the show off Hulu this week, so there might be a little less detail this week. Boy, that evil face of Vince McMahon really is too creepy. He makes fun of Wisconsin. He says the crowd is scared of him. He talks about jobs. Two days from a Pay-Per-View and we get this garbage. I know McMahon would never ever read this article or this review. I know he’s a successful businessman who’s re-made the wrestling business and killed WCW. I also know’s an egomaniac and that his continued presence onscreen only reveals his insecurities. Speaking of revealing insecurities, he then dresses Teddy Long down. And since we can’t call it a “cage match” because it’s too southern wrasslin’ it’s a “Rage in the Cage” match. Great, Teddy Long is on probation You know, fuck Vince and fuck this shit. Moving on…

-R-Truth comes out rapping, but Vince won’t say What’s up. After a commercial, Sheldon Benjamin comes out and speaks. Benjamin says some stuff that confirms that all the writers have to be white. Stuff about education and speaking properly. The delivery wasn’t so bad. What he was saying just continued to drag down this show further.

- R Truth vs. Shelton Benjamin

Since I can’t rewind or fast forward that easily, no times this week. The good news is this match got a fair amount of time and had a chance to develop. The bad news is that it was dreadfully boring because Sheldon Benjamin on offense does not equal success. He wrestles with so little aggressiveness and passion that it’s hard for me not to tune out. The best example was this backbreaker that he executed. He put so little effort into it that it killed the match even further. R-Truth might not be technically sound sometimes, but at least he’s exciting and brings some personality forward. R-Truth wins with what JR called “The Lie Detector.” It’s just his spinkick thing.

Winner: R-Truth

-More Vince. He talks to Rey Rey. Rey Rey speaks Spanish. Teddy Long is next to Vince as Vince points out we only speak English on Smackdown. Racial overtones and now this? What did President Obama do to piss him off now?

- Alicia Fox and Michelle McCool vs. Gail Kim and Melina

Cause this is going to help the show out at this point. Melina and McCool will meet at “The Bash.” I’m sooooooooooo excited for that. Melina gets kicked in the face by McCool, and her post-show plans must now be changed. I love how Gail Kim, chick who can actually wrestle, gets jobbed out. McCool wins with the Fairthbreaker. Gim loses to the bastardized version of the Styles Clash for a third time. I really hate Vince McMahon.

-Two worst words in the English language put together at this point. More Vince. This time he talks with CM Punk. Punk gives this look at the camera as if to say “Look at this goof.” I laughed heartily at this. That redeemed this segment, even when Punk spouted the garbage about being addicted to competition. He says it in such a mocking way that I can’t even be angry anymore.

-Brief discussion of The Great Khali vs. Dolph Ziggler  match that takes place Sunday. Again, thank God I’m not spending forty bucks on that show.

-It’s now time for the first edition of Cryme Time’s Word Up. I guess this is a new weekly segment that’s intended to be funny but isn’t. This was so mind-boggingly awful. They basically rip off Urban Dictionary by defining some word that is something resembling English but really just further bastardizes our language. Jesse interrupts and raps. Great, we have another John Cena rip-off. Where’s Vince to fire all three of these yabos?

- NON-TITLE MATCH: CM Punk © vs. John Morrison

Thank God. Very slow build before the commercial. Always appreciated since that means this is getting 15 minutes. The crowd kinda sat on their hands, but by the end they were going bonkers. Some great maneuvers here as they improved on their series of matches from 2007 ECW.  The ending was also very creative as it ended up being a series of reversals leading into Morrison holding Punk’s  shoulders together for three. Great great match that I almost enjoyed more than Morrison’s with Edge because it leaves the door wide open for these guys to do a match at the following Pay-Per-View. They didn’t even hit any of their big moves, but found a way to have a great wrestling match. Morrison is not all the way there as a babyface, but by continuing to have these kinds of matches, he’s going to be a world champion very soon. The show is saved from an abyss of suck.

Winner: CM Punk

-Punk goes to shake Morrison’s hand… and he plants with a Go 2 Sleep. He then puts his hands to his head as if to wonder what he has just done. This only leaves more doubts about whether he’ll turn or not. Honestly, I don’t think the WWE is quite sure at this point. If Mysterio and Hardy were staying for sure, I think Punk would complete this subtle turn Sunday, but I’m not quite sure at this point. He could still very easily turn, but I’d rather see them wait.

-Josh Mathews interviews Chris Jericho. He asks a dumb question about why Jericho wants to unmask Mysterio. Josh has been paying far too much attention to ECW and not enough Smackdown obviously. One final go home promo that serves its’ purpose as Jericho adds another layer by pointing out how he saved himself and wants to save Mysterio once and for all.

-JR and Tool Grisham talk about “The Bash.” Glad it’s no longer a secret. Here’s the card:

- John Cena vs. The Miz

- NO DQ Match: Dolph Ziggler vs. The Great Khali

- WWE Women’s Title Match: Melina © vs. Michelle McCool
- IC Title vs. Mask Match: Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio
- Unified Tag Team Title Match: Carlito and Primo Colon © vs. Legacy
- ECW Title Scramble Match: Tommy Dreamer © vs. Christian vs. Finlay vs. Jack Swagger vs. Mark Henry
- World Title Match: CM Punk © vs. Jeff Hardy
-WWE Title Three Stages of Hell Match: Randy Orton © vs. HHH
- (The 1st Fall is a Regular Match, The 2nd Fall is Falls Count Anywhere Match, If Needed, the 3rd Fall is a Stretcher Match.)

-The cage comes down, and here we go.

-Vince and Teddy talk to Jeff Hardy.

-Punk looks like a moron in the referee’s shirt with no pants.

- CAGE MATCH: Chris Jericho and Edge vs.  Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy

Very odd rules since you could by pinfall, submission, or one person escaping the cage. This was another really good match as the heat segment was on Mysterio. Basic tag team wrestling within the cage as Jericho and Edge work quite well together. Of course, the guest referee becomes involved as Punk gets speared by Edge after Hardy ducks. Punk sells the rib injury for the rest of the match. Hardy hits a Twist of Fate but with Punk behind him isn’t trusting enough to finish the job. Edge hits the spear on Hardy for the three count. Punk was noticeably reluctant to make the count.

Winners: Edge and Chris Jericho

Final Thoughts: Between Sheldon Benjamin’s speech, the way Vince was treating Teddy Long, and Cryme Time, that was an awfully uncomfortable first half. The Vince McMahon stuff was awfully disturbing too. I’m just so tired of his ego infesting every show he’s on. Honestly, he screeches to a halt any show he’s on. I can see the ending a mile away. Teddy keeps trying to impress, but it doesn’t matter. Teddy is going to get fired. He’s going to get humiliated. Vince will entertain himself, play the bully once again and no one else care.

Thankfully the new Smackdown six of Edge, Jericho, Punk, Hardy, Mysterio, and Morrison save the show once again in the second half. I cannot emphasize enough how awesome these six guys have been with their matches. The interviews have a little to be desired in some cases, but the match quality makes up for it. And in some cases, Jericho is so awesome that Mysterio doesn’t need to say a word to get the fans on his side.

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I’m Zack Danielson, and welcome to another edition of my Superstars Report. On Tonight’s show, the main event will go to Raw, as Kofi Kingston defends the United States Championship against Matt Hardy and MVP in a triple threat match. So here we go:

Match #1. Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne:

-This should be a good opener. Bourne is still selling the rib injury suffered by Mark Henry with his ribs taped up. Swagger takes control early on with a go behind takedown, and then more amateur offense with a single leg trip. Swagger locks in a hammerlock, but Bourne counters into an armdrag. Swagger is right back ramming Bourne into the top buckle, but Bourne comes out of a throw attempt and delivers a low dropkick for a two count. Swagger throws Borune over the top rope as we take a commercial break. I hate a commercial break during an opening match.

-Back from break, Swagger has Borune locked in a waistlock. Bourne counters out, and then hits a low dropkick to the knees of Swagger. Bourne then hits a jumping clothesline. Bourne hits a kick off the second rope for two, and then kicks Swagger to the floor. Bourne goes out to the apron, and springboards off the second rope with a double knee to the face of Swagger. That was sweet. Bourne heads to the top rope after throwing Swagger back inside, but he gets caught and thrown off the top for a two count. Swagger goes for the gutwrench powerbomb, but Bourne counters into a hurracanrana pin for two. Bourne heads up top for the Shooting Star Press, but Swagger moves and Bourne lands on his feet. Swagger is able to clothesline Bourne from behind however, and deliver the gutwrench powerbomb picking up the victory. Nice opener, but knowing these two wrestlers, they could probably easily have a 4 star match with some time.

Winner: Jack Swagger (via pin at 8:45 shown) **1/2

- Dolph Ziggler comes out for the next match. Before the next match, he cuts a promo on his match with The Great Khali this Sunday at The Bash. Seriously, Dolph is a great wrestler, but does anyone seriously give two shits about this feud? Somehow, this match wound up on the PPV this Sunday instead of a John Morrison/Edge rematch.

Match #2. Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Dolph Ziggler

-Huh, didn’t know Yang still had a job in the WWE. Anyways, Match begins with a quick duck down and headlock by Wang. Ropebreak and cheapshot by Ziggler. Reverse exploder suplex by Ziggler for a two. Dolph goes for a neckbreaker, but it’s reversed into a backslide by Wang for only a one count. Ziggler then locks in some crossfaces and a chinlock. Elbows from Wang leads to a not so dangerous back suplex by Ziggler. Ziggler off the middle rope, countered with a dropkick by Wang. Wang now hits a corner leg lariat and holds on to the top rope. High cross body is reversed by Ziggler for only a two. Dolph crotches Yang and hits him with his yet to be name neck snap maneuver, which gets him the three count. Pretty much an extended squash, but it was a good one.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler (via pin at 2:52) *1/2

-After commercials, we get the Raw Rebound. Judging by the big rating it got, i could bet everyone reading this probably watched it. So I’m not gonna bother with this.

-Josh Matthews interviews Kofi Kingston. Kingston says a true champion should always be tested and when it’s all said and done he will still be your U.S. Champion. BOOM BOOM BOOM! Nice, solid promo by Kofi.

Match #3. WWE United States Championship Match: Kofi Kingston(c) vs. MVP vs. Matt Hardy

-This may not be as good as Smackdowns’ Superstars main events, but this will probably still be good. Matt attacks Kofi right at the bell and fires him to the floor leaving him and MVP to do battle. Matt clotheslines MVP in the corner, and hits a bulldog for a one count. Matt delivers a pair of knees to the face, but MVP comes right back with a throw. Kofi comes back in and he and MVP deliver a pair of forearms. Kofi hits a dropkick on Matt, as the faces both double-team him with a double vertical suplex. Kofi goes for the cover, but MVP makes the save and covers himself allowing Kofi to make the save. They have words before Matt pushes Kofi into MVP sending MVP to the floor, and allowing Kofi to get rolled up for two. Matt hits a swinging neckbreaker, and then drops a pair of legs on Kofi. MVP slides back inside, but gets met with a dropkick from Matt. Kofi rolls up Matt from behind for two, and then takes him over with a wristlock for two. Matt clotheslines Kofi on the top rope for a two count that is broken up by MVP who comes back inside. MVP sends Matt to the ropes, and a drop toehold gets a two count for him as we head to break.

-We’re back with Hardy in control after a double clothesline on both Kofi and MVP. Hardy hits a full body slam and elbow drop for two. We get a replay of a dropkick by Kingston on MVP that happened during the break. Monkey flip and dropkick gets a two count as MVP breaks up the pin. It appears this is where Matt Hardy was injured if true as he rolled to the outside in pain. MVP with kicks, knees, a flap jack and a knee drop on Kofi. MVP with a submission attemptl. Kofi with the jump over cross over back elbow. Kingston runs the ropes and Matt Hardy low bridges him and snake eyes him on the barricade. Knees and a neckbreaker gets a two count for Hardy. Standing elbow off the middle rope for Hardy. Reversal into punches by MVP. MVP with the HHH face buster and “Ballin” elbow drop for a two count. Kofi with a kick from behind as MVP goes flying out the ring. Boom Boom legdrop on Hardy and MVP breaks up the pin at 2. Crucifix into a sunset flip is countered by a low short clothesline by MVP. Side effect on MVP gets a two count for Matt Hardy. Kofi comes back with kicks to the face and a high cross body on Hardy. Leap into the corner and punches for Kingston on Hardy. Kingston charges to the other corner and is met with a Yakuza kick from MVP. Twist of Fate by Hardy on MVP. MVP kicks out as Kofi looks for the save. Twist of Fate is countered into the Trouble in Paradise for the 1-2-3. Great Main Event. It’s too bad about Hardy’s injury. Next thing you know, everyone will be calling him injury prone and he’ll be released by WWE.

Winner: Kofi Kingston (via pin at 12:00) ***1/4

Final Thoughts: A really fun show with everything you could ask for from an one hour show. Superstars continues to be a good show for the “wrestling” fan and I look forward to more weeks like this one. See you next week.

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I would like to take this time now to welcome myself, Chris GST to the PWP universe of writings.  I have decided to take this opportunity to introduce myself to the PWP wrestling community. Obviously, a pro wrestling fan of several indy federations and I have been given the task of reviewing most ROH shows and releases alongside give opinions.   For this first shot in the dark writing that I’m putting forth I am going to set the tone throughout my writings right now…

I DON’T BOW DOWN TO THE INTERNET WRESTLING COMMUNITY

I have one major online screen name and under that screen name I post regularly on many wrestling based forums.  Now I have to point out that I’ve been on message boards since roughly 1997, and not entirely all wrestling forums so through the years the “forum etiquette” has been thrown around and seemingly is non-existent on wrestling forums.  Thus I’ve been through many a wrestling debate/argument/heated spamming and I do know that I don’t always have the proto-typical look at the world of pro wrestling.  I’m warning you now that if you disagree with anything I say, feel free to post it, feel free to rant off on me, as long as you know that it’s open grounds for me to rant on your opinion as well.  Lets keep it P.C. and try to stay on topic but fun and ranting has been a staple of the IWC and I’m not going to hinder it.

So for this first debut column, I’m going to bring up the one thing that has been  bothering me, which is a perfect example of how the IWC can be fickle which should be  a given,  about how some of the IWC have stated that they want TNA and WWE to go back to the old school booking style of pure white and black hat characters.  Good guys and bad guys.  Heels and faces.  They want WWE to bring back the style of booking that they we’ve been conditioned to accept, but then, when it comes to a guy who is booking that old school kind of style in Adam Pearce they will crap all over it.  Let me repeat that, they crap all over it.

Why?  Now I’ve been a ROH fan since the first show.  Round Robin Challenge 1 wasn’t even out on DVD yet from what I knew when I found The Era of Honor Begins in a San Francisco Virgin Megastore discount bin and had heard of ROH from online and PWI magazine.  Instantly bought it and the moment I got home that night, I put it in and have been hooked ever since.    So I’m not a new fan nor am I a ROHbot.  I have criticised them and even had been banned once from the ROH message board until I argued my case and was allowed back after a few months.   So what is it that Pearce is doing that is so different from what a “verbal minority” of the IWC is begging TNA and WWE to do with their booking?

Yes, he has slowed down the paces of the matches, he has made the first half and the second half of the shows seemingly different from the Gabe Era which should be expected.  He’s not Gabe and that’s not good or bad, it is what it is.  He’s openly stated that he is going to book more along the style of the 70s and 80s.   When we actually had clear cut black and white, bad and good characters.  A theme that those of the IWC have been clamoring for the “big two” to take another look at and we have it here in ROH, the arguably third most well known wrestling promotion in the United States,  and you’re still not happy.

I’ll be the first to admit that Adam Pearce shouldn’t sacrifice those of us that have stuck with the promotion from the beginning and totally have revamped what it is that we loved about ROH and that was the hard hitting, almost puro-esque style, and drew us in.  But, in his defense, I’ll play devil’s advocate and flat out say that sometimes things have to progress and if this new style is easier for newer fans to come into and understand and then it evolves back into the style that ROH started out with then I’m going to sit back and still support ROH.

If you were to give new ROH fans that did see the PPVs or watch the ROH on HDnet eps and got into the product the DVD At Our Best, they may not even like it.  They may not seemingly understand that the talent of those days have now moved on to better things or at the very least have evolved beyond those styles of matches and now want to focus more on in-ring character building than hard hitting, in your face matches.  Is this good or bad?  Can we accept that perhaps now we have to develop characters in ROH in order for it to continue to grow?  That days of being the no nonsense/minimal characters (cause there were always great characters in ROH, even Gabe has stated that in several interviews) has gone by the wayside to now we have a building of clear cut heels and faces…or are we going to continue to expect something different out of ROH than the other two successful promotions and still expect ROH to succeed?

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Well, we had to contact the lawyers on this one. Rob Naylor joins Jerome and Kevin for one of the best podcasts of the year. This was epic as for over 90 minutes, they go over every topic under the son. They discuss Uncle Elmer, the first matches they ever saw, student advisor’s sucking, journalism sucking, ROH sucking, and the awesomeness of CM Punk. Please click and enjoy one of the best shows we’ve ever put together.

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I know what you’re thinking. It’s not Saturday. What the hell is this goofball doing reviewing ROH this week? Does this guy just like seeing his name print? While that is indeed true I’m a placeholder for this week until one of our new writers joins the party. There will be a number of changes coming to “Pro Wrestling Ponderings,” changes that I’m very excited about and will be addressing on Monday. With all that being said…

ROH on HDNet for June 20, 2009

-Taped from a garbage can in South Philadelphia

-Your hosts are the tortoise and the hare

We begin proper with a graphic announcing the passing of Mitsuharu Misawa. Glad they got this in even though the show has been in the can for quite some time.

BREAKING NEWS: Austin Aries is the new world champion. Wait, didn’t they tape this before the title switch? How did they know? Wait… wrestling is planned? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

We awkwardly transition to the first match which is…

-Claudio Castagnoli vs. Necro Butcher

Great, two of my favorite guys in Ring of Honor right now. I picked a great week to review this television show. Apparently, I can follow Claudio on his Twitter. Since I’d feel like a twat for using Twitter, I think I’ll take a pass. And while I know this wouldn’t be an issue in the olden days, should we really be following heel wrestler’s Twitters? “Today, I’m going to beat up a babyface. LOL.”

We go back to last week before the match begins to when Necro saved Grizzly Redwood. I think the problem with Necro in ROH is that he’s become way overexposed and basically a cartoon character. Necro is best when he’s allowed to have wacky brawls all over buildings and take bumps. Even better is that because certain people in ROH don’t want “too much” and telling people to “Grab a hold, kid” Necro is stuck wrestling boring matches.

Speaking boring, this match was the very definition of that. Not that there was inherently anything wrong with the work, but it was so non-descript and boring that I forgot everything as soon as it was over. Necro doing a monkey flip is cute, but he does nothing for ROH (and this is very sad for the record) he’s in chair-throwing brawls and taking punishment. Jimmy Rave interferes. Claudio hits the ricola bomb for the win.

Winner: Claudio Castagnoli

-Rave and Claudio beat down Necro after the match until Brent Albright makes the save.

-Back to last week again as Austin Aries hit then world champion Jerry Lynn with the belt. They promote the fact that they’ll have PHOTOS of Aries of champion. Guess they don’t want to hurt the replay.

-The high comedy of the week comes next as Nevaeh cuts a promo. I remember her cutting a promo at a CHIKARA show and thinking it was one of the worst promos I’d ever heard and no way should this amateur hour ever be showcased again. Well, not only it is showcased , BUT ON TELEVISION. This promo was no buys. Least she’s hot.

-Non-title: MsChif (w/Jimmy Jacobs) vs. Neveah

-After that sterling promo, I’m pumped. Although compared to the DIVAs on WWE, this was a borderline classic. Still non-descript and boring though. The Crowd was not into this at all. At all. There wasn’t any cheering or booing. I heard a few catcalls, and that’s about it. This was just an extended squash. The ending comes when Jimmy Jacobs tries to get in the ring but MsChif sprays mist into the eyes of Neveah. She hits The Desecrater for the three count. If that sounds familiar, it’s cause it’s similar to how the first match ended. Let’s move on.

-Colt Cabana joins us for “The Art of Pro Wrestling” with Brent Albright. It’s just an excuse to shill for DVDs, but I was actually entertained and I hope to see more of these guys together. Albright answering Colt’s question of what to do with people who ask questions by saying “Punch them in the balls” is the funniest line of the week.

-Winner: MsChif

-We get to see PHOTOZ! of the title switch.

-Highlights of Ric Flair’s final speech to the Philadelphia crowd. Don’t care.

-Kenny King (w/ Rhett Titus and the ho train) vs. Kenny Omega

-Mike Hogewood says he talked to the ladies before the show. Wonder he let them slap his porpoise. We backtrack four weeks to see Kenny Omega upset King in a three-way match beforehand. I actually like both guys and see a ton of potential in Kenny King, so this could be the best thing about the show.

King’s cockiness once again gets the best of him, and he falls to the Omegaplex. This was probably the best non-main event on any of the HDNet shows. Great athleticism and reversals with a couple highspots for good measure. I’d really like to see a regular program between these two because I could see them elevating each other. Good little match… finally.

-Winner: Kenny Omega

-Eddie Kingston vs. Andy “Right Ledge” Ridge

Let me get this straight. Neveah gets a promo, but Eddie Kingston doesn’t? Who is writing this show? Ridge looks like a Low Ki rip-off. This was a squasheroo with extra roo. Always fun to watch Kingston beat people up. Hopefully this feud with Hero, something that’s basically exclusive to television, turns out well.

Winner: Eddie Kingston

-A look at the history of Delirious and Jimmy Jacobs since they have a “Fight Without Honor.” This leads into a promo as Kyle Durden interviews Jacobs. I mentioned this in my review of “Take No Prisoners,” but Jacobs has gotten so mundane and the promos have not been anywhere close to what he was doing in 2007.

-Roderick Strong vs. KENTA

-Main event time and the crowd finally wakes up from their slumber. What a brutal start with chops and kicks being exchanged between these two. I did notice the time and was well aware right away that they wouldn’t get a chance to tell a proper story. They just had to include give matches on this week’s show instead of the usual four. Don’t get me wrong. This was easily the best match of the show and very entertaining, but I’ve seen KENTA have better matches with far worse opponents because he was given the time. This felt like KENTA/Strong-Lite… although KENTA’s purple chest would make you think otherwise. KENTA wins with the Go 2 Sleep. Least it was solid and clean.

Winner: KENTA

Final Thoughts: This very much felt like a television product as opposed to a wrestling product. There was way too much going on in this 50 minute period with five matches, promos, and even some discussion about the world title change that took place last week. I think next week is going to be worlds better with a double main event of Delirious/Jacobs and the tag title main event. But alas, we’ll have a new writer beginning next week. Until then, see you this weekend for what could be my last Smackdown review.

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Last week was the best. This is the worst. Less formal and more of me getting on a soapbox.

Please Retire… PLEASE!- Kurt Angle, Mick Foley, Kevin Nash, Sting

Four people can share this award because they all need to retire once and for all. Some of the reasons are obvious, such as being old. In Mick Foley and Kurt Angle’s cases, it’s to the point where I’m legitmately concerned for their health. I don’t want to see what happened to Misawa happen to either of these guys. Angle is a guy who’s had a history of neck problems and just seems to be the walking wounded at all times. Mick Foley retired back in 2000, but for some reason has developed this idea in his head that he can still be just as good and do all kinds of crazy stuff. Mick is 44 years old. He’s got a beautiful wife and a litter of young children. What in the blue hell does he have to prove? You’re telling me that being yelled at Vince McMahon is worse than pissing away your legacy in a second rate company being propped up by an energy company. Mick could have inducted the Funk brothers this year, but instead he’s working in the damn circus. Fitting that he brought a clown to last week’s IMPACT.

Sting and Nash are just old. Nash does have his share of injuries, but he just looks like an old man while Sting won’t take a bump for anyone. I think all four of these gentlemen can still serve in some capactity like announcing, managing, or even training guys in the case of Kurt Angle, but they need to retire.

Worst Match of the Year- The Submission Squad vs. Davey Vega & Gary The Barn Owl (King of Trios 2009, Night 2)

This was an easy choice. I didn’t want to pick a match from an independent wrestling show because I think it’s unfair to hold these folks to the same standard as the wrestlers who appear for WWE and TNA. That being said, this match sucked. Sooooo much. On what turned out to be an amazing night of wrestling, this set a new standard for poor wrestling. There were botched spots galore, and the crowd was sitting on their hands or getting nachos. If this wasn’t a family show, the crowd would have told them to get out of the ring. I wish we could have channeled ECW for a brief moment and could see the Sandman beat all of these losers up. This was meant to be an “LWA showcase.” Well, the only thing it showcased was how bad this company must suck.

Worst Wrestler of the Year- The Bella Twins

I refuse to pick a wrestler from the independent wrestling scene for this award. To me, the Bellas represent everything wrong with the WWE women’s division. They’re absolutely terrible in the ring, sucking up match after match after match. Then outside the ring, they’re portrayed as basically being whores. The story of the incident in FCW with Bret Hart did not help their cause either.

Worst Company of the Year- CZW

See the Nick Gage incident for an illustration why this company is a boil on the ass of any real independent wrestling that tries to run a professional show. This company needs to die and the people who continue to support this crap should be ashamed of themselves.

Worst Non-Wrestling Personality- Mike Hogewood

At first, I was mildly amused by Mr. Hogewood on the ROH television show. Over the last few weeks, he’s just started to annoy the heck out of me. His lame catchphrases are only a small part of why he’s become one of the worst aspects of a television show that’s made ROH look more mundane then even the the two big companies. It’s not anything to do with his knowledge of the sport or anything like that. He’s just annoying and everything that ROH has become about lately. Goofy and more wacky. The company used to treat wrestling as a sport. Now it’s just product.

Worst Feud- John Cena vs. The Big Show

I’ve seen these guys wrestle about four or five times, and it just continues to be bad match after match. Cena has been hurt so badly by this garbage, and Show seems to get fatter and fatter. Michael Cole on commentary for many of these matches doesn’t help since he cannot credibility tell a decent story when these guys are in the ring. People likely stopped caring a long time ago, but WWE refuses to end this feud.

Biggest FAIL- RAW

I don’t really have a defined explanation for what this award means, but there is no consistently bad aspect of professional wrestling then WWE Monday Night RAW. This is a show that used to be the flagship and the highlight of my week. Now it’s a two hour chore. All of the upper card wrestlers are wicked stale. Michael Cole takes the announcing down about three pegs. Vince McMahon insists on making himself an active part of the show. And then there’s the feuds. There are two horrific feuds going, one of which I’ve already mentioned and the other being between Triple H and Randy Orton. There is no consistently worse booking (other thenIMPACT) the RAW. It’s made even worse considering how awesome this show used to be.

So that’s 2009 so far everyone. At the end of the year, you’ll hear from a lot of other folks who write for this website about the best and worse in professional wrestling. For now, enjoy the rest of 2009 and let me know what you guys think have been the best and worst parts of 2009.

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The independent puroresu company, Dragon Gate, made their debut in the United States on September 5th, 2008 in Los Angeles, California on a Friday night. Along with many Dragon Gate wrestlers being included on the card, several prestigious championships were also defended on this particular event. After the fantastic fan reactions at this event, Dragon Gate went forth with creating a new promotion — Dragon Gate USA. I guess that just shows you how well this show went.

To date, DGUSA has only released two DVDs, including “The Best of Dragon Gate Vol. 1″ and the one I am reviewing right now, “Live in L.A.”. I can’t say that I was exactly satisfied with the “best of”, so I was a little hesitant about picking this event up at first. I’m sure all of the matches were fantastic live, but there is a lot that needs to be taken consideration on a home video, including commentary and sound quality. With all that being taken into consideration, is this DVD worth twenty bucks? Keep on reading to find out.

Retired Pro Wrestling Guerrilla wrestlers and California natives, Excalibur and Disco Machine, are on commentary. Yes, the rumors are true. These guys are known for their comedy on the microphone, so if you’re into serious stuff, then I can immediately tell you that you won’t be getting it on this DVD. I’m not a huge fan of either guy, personally, so I can’t say I’ll be the happiest man in the world if they continue providing commentary for DGUSA shows in the future. That remains to be seen, however.

El Generico defeated Genki Horiguchi via pinfall (brainbuster) - A solid match, but I can’t say I cared for it much. Generico entered the ring in some sort of soldier uniform. Excuse me for not knowing where he was going with the attire. Anyways, both guys wrestled crisply and they provided a nice introduction to the Dragon Gate style of wrestling to fans who are new to the product. Towards the end of the match, Generico botched his split-legged moonsault, so he had to go for it again. This came off a little awkward on camera, I’d say. After avoiding some inteference from YAMATO, Generico nailed Horiguchi with a brainbuster for the win. **½.

Horiguchi, Gamma, Yasushi Kanda, and YAMATO began beating down Generico after the match was over. Doi, Yoshino, and BxB Hulk of WORLD-1 quickly came out to make the save. Despite the fact that Generico is not a member of the WORLD-1 stable, Excalibur made it clear that all six men have a Open the Triangle Gate Championship match scheduled for later tonight. Doi and Gamma exchanged some words, including Naruki Doi surprisingly talking some smack in English.

Necro Butcher defeated Stalker Ichikawa via pinfall (stiff punch) - For those of you who are not familiar with Stalker Ichikawa, he is basically the fortified “funny guy” or “loser” of the Dragon Gate promotion. Excalibur let us know that this match was apart of Ichikawa’s ten match trial series of moving to the heavyweight division. Ichikawa rolled into the ring and told the Los Angeles crowd that he is more “dangerous” than his opponent. Necro gets hears him, gets pissed, and runs out like a mad man. The bell rang and Ichikawa slapped Necro across the face. Necro clocked Ichikawa with a stiff punch and he’s done for the three in literally seven or eight seconds. DUD.

Not even having to break a sweat, Necro quickly celebrated and began heading towards the backstage area. Ichikawa stopped him, though. He wants a rematch right here and right now. Necro does not have to hesitate and accepts his challenge. The bell rings and these two are at it again.

Necro Butcher defeated Stalker Ichikawa via pinfall (chair-assisted Tiger Driver) - Early in the match, Necro goes for the big punch again, but Ichikawa wisely ducks out of the way. Ichikawa successfully lands the Kanchou, but it has no affect on Necro. Ichikawa goes for it again, but he comes up with the same result as before. Necro swings at Ichikawa, but he gets out of the way, and delivers a diving Kanchou to Necro’s rectum. Necro became angry and began throwing Ichikawa all around the arena. Ichikawa got in some inside cradles here and there, but it was pretty much all Necro from this point on. Necro put Ichikawa out of his misery with a Tiger Driver onto a pile of chairs for the win. Fun times. *½.

SHINGO defeated PAC via pinfall (MADE IN JAPAN) - SHINGO was the Open the Dream Gate Champion at this point in time, but it should be noted that this match was non-title. The story was that SHINGO tried hitting PAC with every move in his arsenal to try and ground the “Man That Gravity Forgot”. However, PAC was able to counter with high-flying moves of his own. The crowd seemed rowdy for this match, but because of the crappy sound quality on the DVD, I could barely hear squat. PAC kicked out of a Last Falconry, Blood Fall, and even the Pumping Bomber. SHINGO was able to block the British Airways with his knees. A crazy number of near-falls happened at the end, but MADE IN JAPAN proved to be enough for the inevitable three. Great match, but I think the show’s live reports significantly overrated it. ***½.

Dragon Kid and Kendo beat Keni’chiro Arai and Taku Iwasa via pinfall (Ultra Hurricanrana) - Apparently, Vampiro was supposed to be Dragon Kid’s original partner, but he no-showed. Kendo, a masked Japanese junior heavyweight, is his replacement. Excalibur and Disco Machine are nowhere to be heard. Where the hell did they go? Can’t they keep the commentary consistent? Kendo was terrible and slowed the match down tremendously. He was gassed about three minutes into the match and botched almost every move imaginable. At the end, though, he managed to pull off a decent-looking plancha through the middle rope, so props to him on that. Dragon Kid pins Iwasa with the Ultra Hurricanrana for the win to end a brutal bout. No wonder why there was no commentary. **.

Following the match, Genki Horiguchi ran out and attacked Dragon Kid and Kendo. I was so happy when Genki started stomping on Kendo’s face. A wrestler in a green lucha mask ran down to make the save. The unknown luchador then proceeded to nail Horiguchi with the Schwein. The mystery man teared off his mask and was revealed to be CIMA, much to the crowd’s approval. CIMA grabbed a microphone and thanked the fans for showing up. CIMA refused to shake hands with Dragon Kid before leaving.

Ryo Saito and Susumu Yokosuka beat Matt Jackson and Nick Jackson via pinfall (Premium Bridge) to retain the Open the Twin Gate Championships - Excalibur wisely pointed out that this was the first time a Dragon Gate championship has been defended in the United States. They played it up as if the Young Bucks had home-field advantage, which I found cool. Match was mostly split until the very end, which saw RyoSuka take control of the bout. Matt and Nick nailed their finisher, More Bang For Your Buck, but it was broken up before a three count could be made. Ryo Saito picked up the victory for his team after pinning Matt Jackson with the Premium Bridge. Excellent tag team contest that may have been slightly better than SHINGO/PAC from earlier in the show. It’s crazy to think about how good the Young Bucks are at this stage in their early and young careers. ***½.

Gamma, YAMATO, and Yasushi Kanda beat Naruki Doi, Masato Yoshino, and BxB Hulk via pinfall (avalanche Flashback) to retain the Open the Triangle Gate Championships - Fairly back and forth match except for a long heat sequence on BxB Hulk, as he was getting beaten down by Real Hazard. As usual, Gamma spit an insane amount. At one point, he even spit some contents of a protein shake into BxB’s mouth. Out of all the guys in the match, I’d have to say that Doi, Yoshino, and Gamma looked the best. Dragon Gate always excels in trios matches and this one was no different. Gamma scored the win for his team after pinning BxB Hulk with an avalanche Flashback. Hands down, the best match on the show. I wouldn’t even say anything else came close to beating it. ****.

Honestly, I don’t recommend purchasing this show at all. Every match was forgettable, including the main event. If you’ve seen a bout for the Open the Triangle Gate Championships before, then that’s what you’re going to be getting here. The Open the Twin Gate Championships match and SHINGO versus PAC were both great, but they weren’t anything special.

The graphics and sound quality are both pitiful. Before each match took place, a picture would usually pop up, displaying the competitors’ pictures and names. Now, these looked terrible and appeared like they were done on Paint. Either fix these things up soon or get rid of them completely. The sound, on the other hand, was just as bad. When I watch a wrestling match, I like to hear crowd reactions and different sounds from the ring (for example when a wrestler crashes into the mat). You virtually could not hear anything on this DVD. As one could imagine, it got really annoying after a while.

Excalibur and Disco Machine did a solid job on commentary and clearly researched the promotion’s history and stoylines beforehand. This was something that wasn’t too apparent on Dragon Gate’s “best of” DVD when Prazak and Leonard were in control of commentating. Nevertheless, I can’t say that I would like to continue hearing them on future DGUSA DVDs. There’s just something about their style that begins getting old after a while. Then again, I guess they’re better than Dave Prazak and Lenny Leonard.

If this review still hasn’t convinced you to pass this DVD aside, then you are more than welcome to look into buying it by clicking here. I will continue buying DGUSA DVDs because I am interested in seeing how the company progresses through their United States tour. After all, this could turn out to be the one mediocre show that Dragon Gate puts on. Who knows for sure, though?

- Anthony Perillo

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