Pro Wrestling Ponderings

Welcome once again to another Impact Report from yours truly! This week we’re gonna see the final two participants in the TNA World Heavyweight Championship Match at No Surrender get decided in an eight man tournament.

Let’s jump right in!

September 3, 2009

Match #1: No Surrender Qualifying Match: Rhino vs. Sting

The show opens with a brief rundown of tonight’s event and a clip of Rhino going overboard with Jesse Neal. Tenay notes that both rounds of this qualifier are happening tonight. Good to know.

Rhino starts off with some fists but Sting reverses a whip attempt to get the upper hand. Two Stinger Splashes and a takedown leads to an early Scorpion Deathlock! I smell quick match and a jobbing for the War Machine! Rhino’s crawling to break the Deathlock and he gets there after a few seconds. Rhino charges at Sting’s midsection in the corner and Sting is on the ground. Back up and the War Machine is firmly in control. Lots of fists to the stomach and Rhino locks in a chokehold; after a takedown, he puts a body scissors on. Taz is playing up Rhino’s strength. Sting elbows out of the scissors but gets some chops. Stinger Splash misses and he takes a BIG belly-to-belly suplex. Rhino goes for the GORE but he misses and eats a Scorpion Death Drop! That’s all she wrote!

Winner: Sting

Post match, Rhino hits a GORE, flips off the crowd, and lays into Sting’s midsection further. Rhino goes to leave and hits another GORE! Sting is getting attended to as Rhino is forced from the ring.

Rating: **, a really short match that was actually quite entertaining, but I’m annoyed by the booking. I mean, Rhino is taking on Bobby Lashley at No Surrender. He’s now been jobbed out in less than five minutes. How is that going to build up Rhino for the match?

After a commercial break, Sting is getting his ribs taped. Tenay thinks the ribs are cracked.

The Main Event Mafia is in Booker T’s room, and Booker wants to take out Matt Morgan for his actions last week. Kurt Angle is trying to calm Booker down, and the promo is interrupted with Kip James trying to install a phone line in the room. Booker spouts gibberish and starts insulting Kip. Kurt is restraining Booker as Scott Steiner notes that the MEM locker room is being painted and that he needs to shack up. After a few seconds of discussion (and Booker T spouting more gibberish that needs to be subtitled), Steiner is on the putting green and taking big swings. Is there conflict building between the Tag Team Champs? Who knows, since Booker is talking faster than a jackrabbit on crack!

Match #2: No Surrender Qualifying Match: AJ Styles vs. Chris Sabin

Sabin comes out with Alex Shelley, who’s gonna be doing guest commentary. Shelley puts over the MCMG Tissue Holder (which I would SO buy) and our match begins with a lockup.

Sabin puts in an armbar that Styles reverses. Whip into the corner and we get some armdrags. Shelley puts on the headscissors but Styles kips out of it. Remember kids, AJ Styles is gonna be on “Made” on Sunday! Sabin is dropkicked to the outside and Styles gets a headscissors flip on the floor. Styles eats rail and is thrown inside. The Phenomenal One is thrown into the corner and then takes a solid knee in the ropes. Sabin puts in a headlock but Styles powers out.

Styles catches a boot and slams Sabin to the mat. AJ looks to be in control now, powering Sabin to the mat, but Sabin’s up quickly and tosses Styles to the outside. AJ lands on the canvas, SPRINGBOARD FOREARM! That only gets a two! Styles goes for the Clash and Sabin rol;s up for a 2. Sabin tries for a Cradle Shock but AJ gets out; Sabin is on the ropes, TORNADO DDT by Styles! TWO!

AJ misses a leap to the corner and Sabin eats an elbow! Lots of counters and reversals and AJ eats boot. Sabin misses the springboard and gets a Pele. STYLES CLASH! DONE!

Winner: AJ Styles

Rating: ***1/2, excellent stuff given the time. Very exciting and loads of fun.

We’re backstage with Hernandez, who has to face off with Homicide. Hernandez is conflicted because of their longstanding friendship, but he will let nothing stop him in his quest to become the first Hispanic TNA World Champion. Eric Young is here, and he is still recruiting for the World Elite. He puts in a great line about the American Dream being for Americans Only and says that he and Hernandez are familia.

Back from commercial, and Daniels is coming to the ring with a microphone in hand. Daniels wants to talk to Joe face-to-face and Joe obliges. Daniels talks about the X Division and about the Division revolved around TNA; how he, Joe, and AJ *were* the X Division and that the three of them traveled together and came up together and that they were like family. Daniels brings up the Unbreakable 2005 main event, where the three of them put on a classic for the X Division Title, the only time where a match for that belt main evented a pay-per-view. The three of them were synonymous with wrestling excellence, and they made TNA the future of professional wrestling.

Joe doesn’t care. He has things he needs to do. Daniels stops him and tells him he’s changed because he’s in the Main Event Mafia. He says the Main Event Mafia is scared of Joe and they can’t handle him. He says Joe took the money and ran and that no one recognizes him any more, even his wife and son. NOT SMART. Daniels turns to say something to Taz and Daniels is an idiot for turning his back on Joe. HEAD DROP OF DEATH and that’s that.

Matt Morgan is backstage and he says that Kurt Angle isn’t playing head games, rather that Morgan has made rookie mistakes.

Match #3: No Surrender Qualifying Match: Suicide vs. Doug Williams

Williams is already in the ring as Suicide comes in. Lots of wristlocks and counters to start. Williams ends that with a knee to the back and a headlock. Suicide counters with…a wristlock. Williams powers out and runs the ropes. Boot to the face by Williams, and Suicide is whipped into the ropes. He gets Doug on his shoulders, does a roll, and that gets 2.

Williams tries a German but Suicide elbows; Williams pushes him to the corner he hits a back suplex. Knee in the corner and Williams twists Suicide’s head off. Knee drop and lateral press gets a 2. Suicide rolls out of another back suplex and stars chopping Williams. Flying European by Dougie gets another 2. Williams chokes Suicide in the ropes for a bit then hits a snap suplex for 2 again. Whip and knee to the corner, and Williams is on the top rope. Suicide kicks him in the face with an enziguiri. Suicide has the upper hand and is hitting fists until the ref pushes him off. Suicide is in control now with a springboard dropkick, running Russian legsweep, and scoop slam. As Suicide climbs to the top, D’Angelo Dinero is outside and Suicide leaps off the top and takes him out!

Suicide is back in Doug Williams hits a ROLLING GERMAN FOR THE WIN! UPSET!

Winner: Doug Williams

Rating: **1/2, pretty good but a little lacking in the excitement department.

Sting is with JB backstage and the Stinger might have a few cracked ribs. Sting knows he’s not in his prime and he realizes the end is near for his career, but he’s not giving up the fight.

The Beautiful People are up next for a promo as we’re going to commercial (shed a tear for Angelina Love losing her visa to compete in the US and thus getting released, by the way). The girls don’t care who Madison Rayne’s partners is next week.

Match #4: TNA Knockouts Tag Title Tournament: Tara & Christy Hemme vs. Hamada & Sojo Bolt

Tara and Hamada start off. Waistlock reversals start and Tara gets a roll through and bridge pin that gets a 2 count. They work on each others’ ankles, lots of counters, a couple of pin attempts. Double kip up and a standoff. Something’s a little off in the action between these two. Tara bows and she gets kicked in the head. Hamada hits a press and gets a 2. Hamada tags in Sojo and Bolt gets tripped. Tara slams her and tags in Hemme. Split leg drop that gets a 2 and Hemme whips Bolt in the corner. She misses the charge and Hamada is back in. Big kick to the face as we go to commercial.

Bolt is in control of Hemme as we come back. Tara gets tagged in and she unloads on Sojo. Big clothesline and as Sojo gets up, she gets a kick in the face. Hamada breaks up the pin and Hemme hits a fairly ugly Inverted DDT on Hamada to neutralize her. WIDOW’S PEAK AND THAT”S IT!

Winners: Tara & Christy Hemme

Tara takes out the tarantula and Hamada is holding them off. Instead, she hits a Hamada Driver on Bolt. The lady doesn’t like to lose.

Rating: *1/2, decent enough but nothing special. The match started out rough during the pin attempts, but all four competitors recovered quickly. That inverted DDT was pretty ugly, though. Overall, the match was alright but didn’t do a lot for me.

JB is backstage with Kurt Angle. Borash warns Angle that Morgan might be working him. Angle says nobody works him and that Morgan needs him. Lo and behold Morgan is there and Kurt basically asks if the Blueprint has his back. Morgan goes over their history of teaming together (and how it hasn’t really worked out for Matt) and says he’s got his back. Angle naturally asks if Matt is screwing with him. Morgan says it’s career suicide to screw with the Champ. Angle falls for it.

We get a video package hyping up Homicide and Hernandez after the commercial break.

Match #5: No Surrender Qualifying Match: Homicide vs. Hernandez

Hernandez shows his strength early and Homicide tries for a headlock. The 187 gets out of a back suplex and kicks Big H in the gut. ‘Cide tries a sunset flip and gets picked up by the neck. ‘Cide can’t get anything in and Big H nails a Cracker Jack. A Border Toss attempt is broken up and 187 gets a 2 count after a bulldog. ‘Cide starts working on the leg but Big H quickly reasserts control. ‘Cide tries a Tornado DDT but Big H hits a belly-to-belly. Homicide avoids a charge and runs off the rope. He tries something and Hernandez lifts Cide up for-freakin-ever and hits the Dominator. That’s all she wrote.

Winner: Hernandez

Rating: *3/4, not a lot to this match; it dragged a lot and the leg work really didn’t mean a whole lot. Plus I think everyone knew who was winning this one.

Doug Williams says the rest of the British Invasion is going to be backstage for tonight’s match with AJ. While he rates AJ highly, he thinks he’s even better.

AJ is with Jeremy and he says he hit rock bottom a few weeks ago but he’s back at 100% thanks to sting. He’s going to win tonight. Moving on.

Match #6: No Surrender Qualifying Final: AJ Styles vs. Doug Williams

Kurt Angle is doing commentary on this one.

AJ takes Doug down, but Williams rolls out and gets a headlock takedown. Lots of counters and pinfall attempts. Styles gets a headscissors, Doug escapes, and AJ goes for a cradle pin attempt. That gets 2. Williams tries a bow-and-arrow lock but Styles counters for a quick 1. Williams avoids a dropkick and gets a headlock. AJ counters a body slam and gets a body slam of his own. A dropkick gets 2. I’m having a hard time keeping up wit the action of this one.

Kneedrop by Styles gets 2. AJ gets an Indian Deathlock and then releases the hold. Styles counters a charge but Williams hits a Go 2 Sleep variant with a European Uppercut instead of a knee! That gets 2. Doug has a headscissors on where he keeps ramming his knees to the mat. That gets 2. Doug is really innovating in this match. Styles whips Williams and the two collide. Exchanging forearms and AJ hits a nice dropkick.

Doug goes to the outside and AJ leaps out. For a second there I thought Doug had a big bruise on his head. AJ gets a 2 count and puts Doug into a torture rack. He hits a backbreaker/powerbomb thing for 2. Awesome, awesome stuff! They’re on the top together and AJ is shoved off. Doug hits a top rope European for 2. LARIATO by Styles! Styles tries for a Styles Clash but Williams gets out! Williams reverses a waistlock and is gonna go for the Rolling Germans, but AJ holds on! REVERSE DDT! THAT’S IT!

Winner: AJ Styles

Rating: ***3/4, I really, really enjoyed that. Great work from both Styles and Williams…lots of counters that made sense and plenty of innovation plus a good story in the match.

Angle says there is no way in hell that Styles is taking the title off of him. Styles says he’s not done yet and that nothing will stop him on his quest.

After the commercial we’re backstage with Team 3D and Jesse Neal. Ray calls Neal an American hero. We have to hear Jesse’s story AGAIN. Ray botches his subject-verb agreement (can’t help it, I’m an English teacher!). Jesse is under 3D’s protection and they’re gonna help him become a superstar. Devon says they’re after The British Invasion and they’re getting the IWGP Tag Titles back; they’re also going for Steiner and Booker.

Match #7: Main Event, No Surrender Qualifying Final: Hernandez vs. Sting

Hernandez goes right for the ribs but backs off when Sting is hurt. Big H charges Sting into the corner. Sting gets control back with an atomic drop and dropkick. Big H is clearly conflicted about taking out Stinger in his state. Sting goes to the outside AND HERE COMES HOMICIDE. He takes out Sting and that’s a DQ!

Winner: Sting

It’s clear that it’s not Homicide…it’s ERIC YOUNG!

Rating: *1/2, this one wasn’t so good. The finish with it being Eric Young was cool, but there was nothing to the match. It was like a two minute match which had about two offensive moves in it.

Back from the commercial and Hernandez refuses to leave the ring. He wants Eric Young and the British Invasion storms the ring. The entire World Elite is in and Big Rob comes in from behind. I feel like a CLUSTER is coming to finish the show. Here comes AJ! He tries to clear house but the numbers catch up to him. BEER MONEY is out now! They clear the ring.

And now Team 3D is out on the ramp…the World Elite have nowhere to go! We have a brawl and Devon brings the table! Steiner and Booker come on down and attack 3D. Storm is put through the table and the World Elite and MEM stand tall in the ring to end the show.

Overall: All the focus this week was on the final two participants for No Surrender, and that’s fine, but the one night aspect of this tournament made everything feel rushed. I feel like this should have been spread over two weeks instead of thrown onto one show. That said, the show was still pretty good and there wasn’t a whole lot of stupidity either.

Share This