Pro Wrestling Ponderings

09/07/09 ROH on HDNet

Welcome back readers. We are starting out with an exciting match as we have the duo of Rhett Titus and Kenny King against the returning heroes of ROH, The Briscoe Bros. A great tag team outing as for the first time we see the Briscoes as a team on HDNet, but it’s the youngin’s that are showing their mettle. Diverting attention of both brothers, making sure that their opponent is in their corner, and even then securing their dominance by practically cutting off Mark from Jay for most of the match. I’ll paraphrase D’Lo Brown from the BTR radio show this week in that the true measure of a wrestler is not about when he enters the ring and runs roughshad over his opponent, but it’s when the wrestler can make his opponent look like he’s beating him when under “normal” circumstances it wouldn’t be so. The Briscoes have always been able to do that for other tag teams. All the way to the finish the team of Titus and King looked like they were always within a hairs chance of winning, but with the Doomsday Device, the brothers secure another victory.

American Wolves come out and run down the Briscoes Bros. from the entrance way. But just to show how great the tag division is, Steenerico comes out and practically throws the American Wolves in the ring. After a short beat down, a surreal moment occurs when the team of Steenerico faces off against The Briscoe Bros. with each team holding one tag team belt as the American Wolves yell from the ringside. A great feud just waiting to happen between those three teams.

Nigel interview segment as he’s asked about Lynn and Black. Such a great promo man is Nigel and I do hope that the scripted promos in the fed don’t leech any of his charisma away. Damn I miss the spiked hairdo. The lasting moments after Durden stated that Nigel never gives a clear answer was gold, akin to The Rock staring down Coachman.

Eddie Kingston is out and ready for some action. Hero’s music blasts in darkness but of course who comes out to disappoint is the one and only Shane Hagadorn. Sal Rinauro is beckoned out by Hagadorn and once he backs into Kingston, he kneels down to pray. One spinning backfist later and the match is over as quick as it began. Furthering the fans want to see Hero versus Kingston. They have been building this since July and really this may be stretching it a tad thin as these squash matches are beginning to become redudant.

Another squash match as Nigel McGuinness takes on Aaron Scott. Nothing against Scott, but to make your in ring debut against a former great ROH champion is surely a daunting task. “Kill The Jobber” chants sound off at the beginning of this match and that is pretty much what Nigel starts doing from the get go. A great showing of what Nigel can do and obviously supposed to be a warm up, a warm up that may not get to second gear as most of the internet community knows that Nigel, alongside Bryan Danielson, is going to the WWE in principle. But that doesn’t mean he can’t give us an entertaining match up against Aaron Scott and he does just that with a great showing of his catch and submission style. Aaron gets a few moments of offense as he gets a reversal on the former champ but Nigel quickly returns to the dominant position. Glimers of hope for the young Aaron Scott but it would be Nigel who gets the win with a… DDT? Seemed to be a botched spot as Nigel was clearly going for the Jawbreaker Lariat but Scott dropped his head to “avoid” it but at the same time it did get across that Nigel can finish off an opponent with any weapon from his arsenal so perhaps the point did get across.

Great video package shown for the main event of the night of Jerry Lynn going up against the upstart Tyler Black who seemingly is the choosen one to reign as next ROH world champion. We’ll have to wait and see on that one, but I have predicted before that before or even perhaps at Final Battle 2009, we’d see Black finally reach that brass ring and win the big one. As I am going to the Sept. 19th ROH show in Chicago, I can’t wait to see Danielson and Black hook it up one last time for the forseeable future. The match begins, and as so many others that these two men have had, technical savvy is the starting point.

Obviously the point to get across is that Tyler has matured in the ring and can get those elusive wins in the singles department. From a TV timeline, they are pushing that the win over Nigel is the first step, but that he has a ways to go to become a contender. I seem to remember a certain PPV match where he took then champion Nigel to the limit and really showed his potential in that match. At this stage though, the television crowd is just learning what Tyler Black bas shown fans over the last two years on DVD and on PPV. I would also like to point out that I feel the reason that some are down on Jerry Lynn is because we have seen the greatness that is Lynn and perhaps are a tad jaded and some feel that there is nothing new Jerry can show them. I’m not sold on that yet as I feel perhaps a heel Jerry Lynn could reinvigorate his character in ROH.

Great back and forth action as Jerry Lynn shows speed of men half his age mixed with respectable holds and counter holds by both competitors. You can almost feel the mood in the building change as both men really are beginning to pick it up a notch. Silently and almost as if to surprise the men in the ring,Nigel has come to ringside to not only join the spectators, but to issue out some opinions. The reasons are his alone, but it is clear that he means to make sure both men know what he’s thinking. The crowd seems to notice but at the same time can’t tear their eyes from the action in the ring. Each resounding two count earns more and more cheers from the crowd for either competitor, but it would see that while neither man wants to give up, they both don’t have much left in the tank. Turnbuckle bomb and right into the super kick but soon we see a glimor of Nigel’s plan as he puts Lynns foot on the rope for the count break. Even the kids in the front row seem to be pleading with Black to not take his eyes off of Lynn, but it could be too soon too late as Lynn gets a small package and the win. Great match to end the night and it would seem that Black and Nigel are going to have at least one face off before the ROH legend goes to the WWE. Thanks for reading folks.

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I know what you’re thinking. It’s not Saturday. What the hell is this goofball doing reviewing ROH this week? Does this guy just like seeing his name print? While that is indeed true I’m a placeholder for this week until one of our new writers joins the party. There will be a number of changes coming to “Pro Wrestling Ponderings,” changes that I’m very excited about and will be addressing on Monday. With all that being said…

ROH on HDNet for June 20, 2009

-Taped from a garbage can in South Philadelphia

-Your hosts are the tortoise and the hare

We begin proper with a graphic announcing the passing of Mitsuharu Misawa. Glad they got this in even though the show has been in the can for quite some time.

BREAKING NEWS: Austin Aries is the new world champion. Wait, didn’t they tape this before the title switch? How did they know? Wait… wrestling is planned? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

We awkwardly transition to the first match which is…

-Claudio Castagnoli vs. Necro Butcher

Great, two of my favorite guys in Ring of Honor right now. I picked a great week to review this television show. Apparently, I can follow Claudio on his Twitter. Since I’d feel like a twat for using Twitter, I think I’ll take a pass. And while I know this wouldn’t be an issue in the olden days, should we really be following heel wrestler’s Twitters? “Today, I’m going to beat up a babyface. LOL.”

We go back to last week before the match begins to when Necro saved Grizzly Redwood. I think the problem with Necro in ROH is that he’s become way overexposed and basically a cartoon character. Necro is best when he’s allowed to have wacky brawls all over buildings and take bumps. Even better is that because certain people in ROH don’t want “too much” and telling people to “Grab a hold, kid” Necro is stuck wrestling boring matches.

Speaking boring, this match was the very definition of that. Not that there was inherently anything wrong with the work, but it was so non-descript and boring that I forgot everything as soon as it was over. Necro doing a monkey flip is cute, but he does nothing for ROH (and this is very sad for the record) he’s in chair-throwing brawls and taking punishment. Jimmy Rave interferes. Claudio hits the ricola bomb for the win.

Winner: Claudio Castagnoli

-Rave and Claudio beat down Necro after the match until Brent Albright makes the save.

-Back to last week again as Austin Aries hit then world champion Jerry Lynn with the belt. They promote the fact that they’ll have PHOTOS of Aries of champion. Guess they don’t want to hurt the replay.

-The high comedy of the week comes next as Nevaeh cuts a promo. I remember her cutting a promo at a CHIKARA show and thinking it was one of the worst promos I’d ever heard and no way should this amateur hour ever be showcased again. Well, not only it is showcased , BUT ON TELEVISION. This promo was no buys. Least she’s hot.

-Non-title: MsChif (w/Jimmy Jacobs) vs. Neveah

-After that sterling promo, I’m pumped. Although compared to the DIVAs on WWE, this was a borderline classic. Still non-descript and boring though. The Crowd was not into this at all. At all. There wasn’t any cheering or booing. I heard a few catcalls, and that’s about it. This was just an extended squash. The ending comes when Jimmy Jacobs tries to get in the ring but MsChif sprays mist into the eyes of Neveah. She hits The Desecrater for the three count. If that sounds familiar, it’s cause it’s similar to how the first match ended. Let’s move on.

-Colt Cabana joins us for “The Art of Pro Wrestling” with Brent Albright. It’s just an excuse to shill for DVDs, but I was actually entertained and I hope to see more of these guys together. Albright answering Colt’s question of what to do with people who ask questions by saying “Punch them in the balls” is the funniest line of the week.

-Winner: MsChif

-We get to see PHOTOZ! of the title switch.

-Highlights of Ric Flair’s final speech to the Philadelphia crowd. Don’t care.

-Kenny King (w/ Rhett Titus and the ho train) vs. Kenny Omega

-Mike Hogewood says he talked to the ladies before the show. Wonder he let them slap his porpoise. We backtrack four weeks to see Kenny Omega upset King in a three-way match beforehand. I actually like both guys and see a ton of potential in Kenny King, so this could be the best thing about the show.

King’s cockiness once again gets the best of him, and he falls to the Omegaplex. This was probably the best non-main event on any of the HDNet shows. Great athleticism and reversals with a couple highspots for good measure. I’d really like to see a regular program between these two because I could see them elevating each other. Good little match… finally.

-Winner: Kenny Omega

-Eddie Kingston vs. Andy “Right Ledge” Ridge

Let me get this straight. Neveah gets a promo, but Eddie Kingston doesn’t? Who is writing this show? Ridge looks like a Low Ki rip-off. This was a squasheroo with extra roo. Always fun to watch Kingston beat people up. Hopefully this feud with Hero, something that’s basically exclusive to television, turns out well.

Winner: Eddie Kingston

-A look at the history of Delirious and Jimmy Jacobs since they have a “Fight Without Honor.” This leads into a promo as Kyle Durden interviews Jacobs. I mentioned this in my review of “Take No Prisoners,” but Jacobs has gotten so mundane and the promos have not been anywhere close to what he was doing in 2007.

-Roderick Strong vs. KENTA

-Main event time and the crowd finally wakes up from their slumber. What a brutal start with chops and kicks being exchanged between these two. I did notice the time and was well aware right away that they wouldn’t get a chance to tell a proper story. They just had to include give matches on this week’s show instead of the usual four. Don’t get me wrong. This was easily the best match of the show and very entertaining, but I’ve seen KENTA have better matches with far worse opponents because he was given the time. This felt like KENTA/Strong-Lite… although KENTA’s purple chest would make you think otherwise. KENTA wins with the Go 2 Sleep. Least it was solid and clean.

Winner: KENTA

Final Thoughts: This very much felt like a television product as opposed to a wrestling product. There was way too much going on in this 50 minute period with five matches, promos, and even some discussion about the world title change that took place last week. I think next week is going to be worlds better with a double main event of Delirious/Jacobs and the tag title main event. But alas, we’ll have a new writer beginning next week. Until then, see you this weekend for what could be my last Smackdown review.

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During Memorial Day weekend, CHIKARA held one of their two anniversary events at the Arena in Philadelphia. “Anniversario Yang” was headlined by a “lucha de apuestas”, which translates to “mask versus hair” in Spanish. The last time CHIKARA fans saw a match of this sort was in 2007 between “Marvelous” Mitch Ryder and Lince Dorado. After Worker Ant was shockingly forced into retirement after Chuck Taylor and the rest of F.I.S.T. brutally assaulted him, it made sense for Leonard F. Chikarason to book a match of this high caliber between the Colony and F.I.S.T.

Upon hearing all of the feedback on how well this show went live, I knew that I would have to fork over twenty bucks to check it out for myself. With the main event being described as “one of the best CHIKARA matches ever”, I knew that I would be stupid to miss out on something that sounded this fun and spectacular. In addition, many of the undercard matches also intrigued me. How can you pass up on Glacier and D’Lo Brown versus the UnStable, an “atomico”, and Claudio Castagnoli versus Eddie Kingston? I know for sure that I can’t.

Brodie Lee and Grizzly Redwood beat El Hijo del Ice Cream and Ice Cream, Jr. via pinfall (logger pin) -  A fun opener that the Philadelphia crowd really got into. Sometimes I wonder how Brodie Lee and Grizzly Redwood manage to draw in so much heat. Eddie Kingston putting over his fellow Roughneck stablemates on commentary also added to the many comedy aspects of this match. In approximately nine minutes of back and forth action, Brodie threw Grizzly onto both Ice Creams and held him down on top of them with his foot for the pinfall. Lee and Redwood regain one point. Kudos to Mr. Kingston for a great version of “God’s Gonna Cut You Down” by Johnny Cash post-match. **.

Ophidian defeated Arik Cannon via pinfall (prawn hold) - Who would have expected a bout this great so early into the show? There were just way too many false finishes to name here. Cannon managed to survive the Death Grip on a couple of occassions. As Ophidian had it locked onto him one time, Cannon managed to use his strength to transition the submission into a sick brainbuster for a near-fall. Cannon then proceeded to rock Ophidian with Total Anarchy, but that only got him a two count, as well. Running out of options, Arik Cannon signaled for the Glimmering Warlock. When the referee’s back was turned, Amasis popped up out of nowhere and yanked on Cannon’s leg. This distracted Arik long enough for Ophidian to capitalize with a prawn hold for the three count in nearly eleven minutes. Good, good times. ***½.

UltraMantis Black, Crossbones, and Delirious beat Player Uno, Player Dos, and Create-A-Wrestler via pinfall (Praying Mantis Bomb) - Following being kidnapped last month, Delirious is now a member of the Order. He’s sporting silver and black gear now, so he fits in with the appearance of UltraMantis Black and Crossbones. This was upgraded from a regular tag team contest between the Order and the Super Smash Brothers to include Delirious and Create-A-Wrestler, as well. It should be noted that Louden Noxious mentioned how UMB was controlling Delirious with the Eye of Tyr on commentary. I don’t know if it was just me, but Delirious seemed to be a little off in this match. He and Dos had some really sloppy sequences in the early going. Other than that, though, this was a solid match. Dos and Crossbones had some real exciting encounters when they were in the ring with one another. After Delirious blocked a Dig Dug Driver attempt by Uno, Delirious hit the Praying Mantis Bomb on him. UMB then took credit for the win by covering Uno for a three count in about ten minutes. Post-match saw UltraMantis lift the Eye of Tyr into the air for everyone in the crowd to see, as he and the rest of the Order praised its power. ***.

Vin Gerard, STIGMA, and Colin Delaney are in the backstage area, ready to shoot on their upcoming match against Glacier and D’Lo Brown. Normally, I post promo videos for everyone to check out for themselves. However, at the time I am posting this review, ChurchOfMilMongoose has not uploaded these specific snippets onto his YouTube account yet. Anyways, Vin wants to know why Glacier and his pals keep coming back for more punishment. Colin pinned D’Lo Brown at “King of Trios 2009″ and Vin beat him in a singles match last month. Before the UnStable get the oppurtunity to say much more, Leonard F. Chikarason interrupts them in mid-sentence. LFC demands for the cameraman to back off. Although we do not see a visual, Chikarason can be heard asking Delaney why he has been communicating him so awkardly lately. Colin promptly tells LFC that he hasn’t been calling him at all and that if Chikarason doesn’t stay out of the UnStable’s business from now on, then he will have to have a little chat with Dave Coulier. Really strange promo, but I’m sure that we’ll be hearing more about this situation later.

Glacier and D’Lo Brown beat Vin Gerard and Colin Delaney via pinfall (Cryonic Kick) - This turned out to be way better than anyone would have thought it was going to be. About two minutes into the match, Brown knocked Vin out cold with a stiff lariat, complete with blood gushing out of his mouth. D’Lo wrestled the whole match in a pretty stiff fashion, but I don’t think it was completely intentional. Brown has been wrestling in Japan a lot lately and obviously, the style they use there is much different than the stuff going on in a CHIKARA ring. Glacier also got in on the fun by bloodying up Colin about six minutes into the bout. D’Lo looked to attack Gerard on the outside, but STIGMA got involved when Bryce Remsburg wasn’t looking. D’Lo finally managed to make the hot tag to Glacier.  Much to everyone’s surprise, D’Lo locked the CHIKARA Special in on Colin Delaney. Gerard trying breaking up the hold, but Glacier rocked him with a Cryonic Kick out of nowhere to score the pinfall at the twelve minute mark. Afterwards, STIGMA tried attacking the veterans, but he wound up getting a Cryonic Kick for his efforts. For good measure, Brown also nailed him with a Lo Down. Just a real great match that also had an awesome story to it. ***¼.

Jagged and Shane Matthews are backstage, standing in front of the CHIKARA logo. Why the heck aren’t they talking? Is my DVD screwed up? After a while of complete silence, a scrolling message appears that explains that 2.0 have refused to speak until they gain one point. The facial expressions on Matthews and Jagged during this promo were absolutely priceless. Definitely go out of your way to check this one out when it becomes available for viewing on YouTube.

Jagged and Shane Matthews beat Tim Donst and Hydra via pinfall (kneeling frog press) - In the beginning of the match, Shane Matthews taunted the Sea Donsters by saying that Hydra is “on the gas” and will be fired soon because of CHIKARA’s Wellness Policy. Before the situation got heated, though, Matthews offered to play a song on Tim Donst’s guitar. Shane strummed a few chords at first, but then attempted to smash it over Donst’s head. Donst ducked out of the way and quickly followed things up with a Stroke. Shades of Jeff Jarrett right there. Minutes later, Matthews began giving everyone in the ring a Boston Crab, including Jagged who apparently tapped to his own partner’s move. Hydra rolled up Jagged, but it was reversed into a kneeling frog press that surprisingly was enough for 2.0 to pick up the victory and one point in approximately four minutes of action. Hydra apologized to Donst afterwards, but Tim walked out on him, hinting at a possible heel turn in the future. This was unusually short, but it was fun for what it was worth. *½.

Jigsaw, Lince Dorado, and Helios are on camera in the backstage area. Lince is anxious because his team is down one man in the “atomico” match. Equinox pulled out of the show due to injury, so it’s now four against three. Before the three guys can discuss the matter, Jigsaw wants to apologize for taking the fall against F.I.S.T. last night at “Aniversario Yin”, but he explains that he tried his best. In fact, all three of them tried their best and that’s all that matters. Lince seems antsy about what Jigsaw has to say, but before he can come up with a long response, Mike Quackenbush comes out of nowhere. Quack asks Jigsaw if he told Helios and Lince about “plan B”. Jigsaw says he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Quack pulls all three guys over to the side and tells them that he will explain to them off-screen.

Hallowicked, Frightmare, Cheech Hernandez, and KC Day beat Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw, Lince Dorado, and Helios via pinfall (powerbomb-Shining Wizard combination) - A simply insane match that featured a bunch of wild moves throughout that the fans seemed to greatly appreciate. Cheech and Cloudy took the green gear of Incoherence, while the real Hallowicked and Frightmare entered with new orange attires. For those of you who were wondering, it should be noted that Mike Quackenbush took the place of Equinox. Anyways, Lince Dorado has improved so much over the past couple of months. He’s more than worthy of becoming Young Lions Cup Champion at this point. Frightmare also looked superb out there, nailing every move to near perfection. Quack didn’t get too much offense in because I’m sure he can’t risk further injuring his back. Cheech and Cloudy pin Lince with a cool powerbomb combination move for the three in nearly fifteen minutes. The crowd chanted “that was awesome” after the match had ended, as all eight men posed in the ring with each other. CHIKARA really excels in these “atomico” matches, so there was really no better time than their anniversary weekend to have one. ****.

Eddie Kingston is talking about insanity and how his particular case is different from everybody else’s. He mentions rooming with Claudio Castagnoli when he moved from New York to Pennsylvania. At one point, both guys were good friends with one another. After their match at “AnniversarioCT”, however, Kingston didn’t receive a handshake or any sign of respect from Claudio. This angered him. Tonight, Claudio Castagnoli versus Eddie Kingston will be personal. As usual, a great promo by King.

Eddie Kingston defeated Claudio Castagnoli via pinfall (Oklahoma roll) - The Philly fans were split on both sides, as Kingston dished out backhands and Claudio answered with uppercuts. Both of these guys just threw everything they could at one another. Hell, Kingston even broke out a tope suicida to the floor at one point. Claudio also showed a high-flying side to himself here, doing a couple of springboard manueveurs on a few occassions. Claudio nailed a bicycle kick on Kingston and tried finishing him with the Ricola Bomb. However, as Castagnoli was setting up for the move, Kingston reversed it into an Oklahoma roll to pick up the huge win in eighteen minutes. As one would have expected, this was a very good match. ***¾.

Fire Ant and Soldier Ant beat Icarus and Chuck Taylor to win the hair of F.I.S.T. via pinfall (Beach Break) - Gran Akuma and Green Ant are in the corners of their respective teams. F.I.S.T. and the Colony began brawling around the arena right away. As things settled down, Soldier Ant began getting a beating, in turn getting a hole in his mask around his mouth and getting his top torn.  A few minutes later, Taylor set the time keeper’s table up by the apron. Bryce Remsburg got knocked down unintentionally by Fire Ant, which allowed Chuck to give Soldier Ant an Awful Waffle off the apron and through the table. Soldier Ant was knocked out cold and Green Ant had to bring him to the backstage area. At this time, Fire Ant was forced to fight on his own. Taylor and Icarus seemed to have him down for the three on more than one occassion, but kept pulling his shoulder up to continue the punishment. Big mistake on their part. Icarus nailed the Pedigree on Fire, but he miraculously kicked out. Chuck had enough of toying around with Fire Ant, so he applied the one-legged Boston crab that he tapped Danielson out with at “King of Trios 2009″ in the finals. Just when it looked like Fire was about to tap out, Soldier Ant came limping from the back and tried breaking up the submission. Gran Akuma held him back, though, so he was unable to do anything. That is, until a new brown ant came in and made the save. This allowed Soldier to finally break up the Boston crab. This is when we started getting a crazy sprint of moves, including an insane running Awful Waffle on Fire Ant and a TKO by Soldier Ant on Chuck. Fire Ant hit the Beach Break, but Chuck somehow managed to kick out of it. Fire went for it again, nailed it, and put him away for the win. Standing ovation from the crowd, as Fire and Soldier shaved the heads of Icarus and Taylor. Hands down, the best CHIKARA match I have ever seen to date. The drama that these four guys managed to pull off was breath-taking, to say the least. If this isn’t nominated for a MOTYC, then there’s something seriously wrong with the IWC. ****½.

What are you waiting for? Get this show on DVD from SMV as soon as possible. Pick it up for the main event and the “atomico” tag. Along with Claudio/Kingston and Cannon/Ophidian both being very good, the Glacier and D’Lo tag completely surpassed my expectations, as well. Not to mention, the Order of the Neo-Solar Temple taking a big turn with the addition of Delirious is also worth giving a look at. I can’t put it any simpler by saying that this was an outstanding show.

Also, just to give everyone a heads up — there will not be a new “CHIKARMY Insider” article until next weekend. I’m busy with working, the ACT exam, and studying for final exams over the weekend. It’s probably better for me to wait, anyways, because a whole lot of news hasn’t surfaced since the last article I posted. Thanks for understanding and being patient.

- Anthony Perillo

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