Why Chicks Should Be Banned From All-Star Voting

Perhaps I've been drinking too much of the Colin Cowherd Kool-aid, but I've realized female sports fans are messing with the natural order of things -- and that is turning me into a chauvinistic, repressive fool. As I recall, Colin has spoken about the upsides -- a requirement even -- of having a relationship with a girl who doesn't love sports. [read more...]

Giddy up, does Tom Brady in drag turn me on?

I'm pretty sure I don't want to know the answer to that, because it will most likely keep me awake at night, questioning my sexuality again. Is he pretty? Why do you make me sweat at night with your sexy touchdowns cute quarterback? What I do know is that Cate Blanchett playing Bob Dylan in the Zimmy biopic I'm [read more...]

High gas prices can’t shut down Pistons on the road

A possible looming recession doesn't appear to be affecting the Detroit Pistons' attendance -- leading the NBA at the turnstiles for the fifth time in six seasons -- and the motor city's bad boys didn't run out of fuel during a back-and-forth playoff series where the Sixers surprisingly put a little gunk in their carburetors before the Philly economy car [read more...]

Boston-Atlanta: Where Head-Butting and Not Getting Tossed Happens

I'm wondering if anyone noticed that fact that, just before Game 4 (about 6 p.m.) of the Boston Celtics-Atlanta Hawks matchup the league informed Paul Pierce that he would be fined $25,000 for making a "menacing gesture" during Game 3. The "gesture" Pierce made was said by Commissioner David Stern and his patrolman Stu Jackson to be a "Blood gang [read more...]

Howard flying high in playoff losses

It's probably only a matter of time before congressman Henry Waxman is quizzing Josh Howard about whether or not he attended a party at Rasheed Wallace's house -- where he allegedly talked to a grower of Northern Lights. Waxman: "Do you have a medical condition that requires you to smoke dope Mr. Howard?" Howard: "When I have injuries, I just light [read more...]

Playoff Push

Current Record: 24-36 ... 1.5 Games out of a playoff spot. Following Tuesday's easy, but important win against the Memphis Grizzlies, the Bulls record is now 24-36. Following Wednesday night's action, they are 1.5 games out of the playoffs. Despite the fact nearly every possible thing has gone wrong this season, the Bulls still have a very solid shot of making the [read more...]

Around the Horn

We know you thought this would happen. So pardon us for feigning, no, actually displaying pure shock. Still, while watching the Bulls land in the 4th spot in the East, we are still palpably surprised. Whether the glass is half full: the Bulls are a strapping, resourceful young team, or half empty: the East is more shallow and empty than Nick [read more...]

Hart Surgery: Seventh Heaven

Well, I suppose I should have kept my mouth shut about these NBA playoffs. A week after declaring this year's version the worst I'd ever seen, we saw two of the best games in playoff history. First the Lakers amazing win over the Spurs in Game 5 out West. I know I talked about it last week, but I cannot stress enough how big [read more...]

Hart Surgery: The Ultimate Sports Weekend

Take a deep breath sports fans. Get all your chores finished early, drop your kids at their grandparents, and get a good night sleep. It is time for the Ultimate Sports Weekend. This weekend, April 23-25, is the only one the entire year featuring significant events for all four major sports. Baseball's regular season, the NFL Draft, and the NBA and [read more...]